Please Advise

Corporate Jargon for What The Fuck.

Dear jim,

I have not yet received the Alabama case files I asked you to Send.

Please Advise.
John

by notGandalf February 12, 2013

Please Advise

An extremely stuffy phrase used by business executives to close emails when they don't understand how to ask a real question. It basically means "Please use your imagination to figure out what the fuck I need to know to make a decision on this item without making me look like an idiot in front of all the people I CCed"

"Please Advise" is typically used in place of "Thanks" in formatting an email. It is very passive aggressive. Always assume that the user of the phrase "please advise" is a college graduate that follows the advice of his professors to a T... Even 15 years later..

Dear Luke,

I recently got a call from Alex in LA telling me that we're out of blinkity blank in California so the blippity blue isn't working. What-the-fuck what-the-fuck we're losing 15k a day what-the-fuck save me please.

Please Advise,
John

by ldemi April 29, 2011

Please Advise

The proverbial business bitchslap.

Hi Carrie,

How are you? Happy Monday! I was wondering when you were going to get me that quote I asked for last week. If we don't get the ball rolling ASAP my client will look for another company.

Please advise.

All the best,
Christine.

by eventjubilee February 25, 2013

Advise

An overly used verb used by douchey corporate types to sound more professional in emails and conference calls.

1. I have not yet received that report. Please advise.
2. I am looking into the matter. Will advise.

by Lopeytal March 4, 2009

will advise

Corporate jargon for Fuck Off.

I am working on the Alabama case files right now, and will have them on your desk by 4pm, unless you call me into another meeting about the break room microwave again.
Will Advise.

by Disgruntled Co-Worker February 24, 2014

honest advise

Providing wisdom and thinking you are helping mankind, but others just see you as an idiot.

If your really up for honest advise, use two-ply, this way your fingers don't get stinky.

by abat97 October 30, 2009

trip adviser

a person whos not doing any kind of drugs but is their to make sure nobody does some stupid shit

1. yo I almost go arrested last night, but luckily my trip adviser mohammed was their to make sure i didn't steal that alpaca.
2. can you be my trip adviser? ive never done weed before, so im not sure what's going to happen

by pink world October 13, 2019