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Struttin' That Ass

The first meaningful step took since Thomas Aquinas on the oldest and greatest philosophical question man has ever been faced with: 'Does God Exist'?

The answer: You'd be so goddamn fucking tired everytime you get to newhope, that you won't be struttin' that ass(STA^-1)... you'll be huh huh!

This breakthrough is in a message which was revealed to the masses by The Strut-Pope Gutter Ass The Third, first of his name, BLESSED BE, and may he NEVER strut away from the light.

Most remarkable is the scientific aspect, which can be elegantly translated to MATHEMATICS. The equation can be expressed thusly: If you got a fucking Mercedes-Benz and you ain't walking, you WILL be struttin' that ass, struttin' that ass. In this case you will have a Struttin'-That-Ass quotient of 2, or (STA^2). On the other hand, If you be walkin', and you be NOT struttin' that ass, then you will have a Struttin'-That-Ass quotient of -1, or (STA^-1).

This is an exciting time to be alive. We are on the precipice of both redemption and damnation. It's time to throw down once and for all and decide which side you are on: The side of the Strut-Pope(STA^0), or the side of the vile Chauvinistic Pigs, who strut that ass however many times they please(STA^∞), entropy and the law of conservation of energy BE DAMNED!

NOTE: If any particular situation is not laid out by the Strut-Pope, as briefly reviewed below, be aware that the default stance is to be struttin' that ass, struttin'(STA^1.7).
Situations whereupon you will be in a negative quantum "Struttin'-That-Ass" co-efficient (STA^-x):

*When you start walking, my friend! And you get ten fifteen miles on the highway you won't be struttin' that ass(STA^-1)! You'd be half dead by time you get there.

*When you walk about fifteen twenty miles, you won't be struttin' that ass(STA^-1). You'll be so fucking tired you won't hard hold that ass up. . . UNGH!!! You won't be struttin' that ass, struttin' that ass(STA^-2)!

Situations whereupon you will be in the "Struttin'-That-Ass" meta-state(STA^x):

*It's a chauvanistic pig attitude that you gonna do something because you work at (mumble-stone), you got a fucking mercedes benz, and you ain't got to walk everyday so you goin' to get out and strut that ass, strut that ass, strut that ass, strut that ass, strut that ass (STA^5).

*So it's a chauvinistic pig attitude that clinton's got; strut that ass(STA^1).
by glueboy July 8, 2010
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ass dander

n. dead and otherwise useless skin, hair, feces, drippings, and/or other human tissue that is routinely sluffed from one's ass.
"The crumb tray on that chair is carrying a full load of ass dander."
by Wendellian February 7, 2006
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ass ride

To lose a large some of money or to have severe misfortune or bad situation/delima. To be taken advantage of or to get screwed over by someone or something.
I took and ass ride in the stock market today.
Oh boy, that son of a bitch is gonna go for an ass ride.
If that hurricane hits here, were gonna go for one hell of an ass ride.
The used car salesman took him for an ass ride.
by Larry bell August 21, 2007
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pounding ass

A slang term for having sex (straight or gay).

When a male inserts his cock into a girls or a guys ass and fucks it.
I saw Sean pounding ass in the bathroom.

I pounded a girl in the ass last night! It was some on the best sex I ever had!

I caught Dave pounding Sam's ass in the closet.
by The Contributor September 22, 2013
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ass athiest

Person who does not believe in anal sex.
Dude I tryed fuckin her in the ass but shes an ass athiest
by coppola March 11, 2008
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Kiss Ass

A kiss-ass, otherwise known as a teacher's pet, brown-noser, or in case of the office, a 'Yes,man/woman', is a person who will constantly suck up to a person in a higher position, hoping to gain attention and/or favor.

They are the ones who are in the office on weekends (usually the only ones there), while everybody else is having fun. Or they are usually the first ones there and the last to leave.

They generally allow themselves to be stepped on, walked over, and shit on, all in the hopes their efforts will be noticed by their superiors.
Brad: Hey, is Jim going to join us at the baseball game?

Tom: Nah. He's too busy pulling an all-nighter at the office

Brad: What a corporate kiss ass
by marc2010 November 14, 2012
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Castle Ass

The severe gastrointestinal disturbance that follows the consumption of a large volume of White Castle burgers, especially a 10-sack of cheeseburgers.
Castle Ass is the number one killer of young adult males in Wisconsin.
by Jon April 4, 2005
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