between the dildo store and the crematorium

1. Complete, total and utterly humiliating failure.

2. To be at rock bottom, in the most embarrassing and potentially absurd way possible. Your life has never been worse.

Man, did you see how sad Rudy's speech was last night? He's really between the dildo store and the crematorium now.

by lord troublebubble November 11, 2020

dildoing

1. the act of fucking a vibrator or dildo
2. a pleasure of orgasmic perportions

Is that girl dildoing her hairy pussy?

by Phew May 5, 2004

dildo

Much like the meteor that killed the dinosaurs, the dildo will eventually lead the the extinction of the human race.

Who needs men anyways, I have my dildo to keep me company.

by Justin Mozuch December 29, 2005

Dildo Faggins

Name of a famous hobbit-like creature who penned the booked "there and my backend again" also known as "Lord of the Cock Rings".

Dildo Faggins was very proud of his nephew Froho Faggins

by Elton's Johnson September 2, 2006

Dead Battery In A Dildo

When you are very excited to do something but find out that you cant

Thats a dead battery in a dildo

by Fin Germatwat October 31, 2010

dildi

1) plural of dildo. Same as dildos.

2) citizens of Dildo, New Foundland

"She didn't just have a dildo in her bedside drawer, she had dildi - a pink one, a black one, a 10 inch long blue one, and one hooked up to a battery charger. It was then that I knew our time together would be short and sweet."

"We are Dildi"

by R-biscuit September 6, 2008

Spunky Dildohammer

Obtain a jar of japanese mayonnaise and slather your stale hawt dawg with it. Tell your blind or visually impaired sexin' woman that you're gonna pleasure her with a dildo and butt plug. Lube up a dildo and butt plug in front of her. Stuff the butt plug in her beaver and jam your mayonnaised schlong into her mudflaps. She'll think it's the dildo, til you squirt your baby gravy in there. Then thwap your shrinking dong on her breasts. You must eat half of a Wild Berry Pop Tart during this process, and when you've finished jam the other half into her fuzzy cumdumpster.

Tom Selleck: hey babe want me to rub my moustache on you tonight?
Someone's Mom: Nah. I'm in the mood for plastic tonight.
Tom Selleck: PREPARE TO BE PULVERIZED!
(5 min. later)
Someone's mom: OMG that wasn't a dildo! That was a Spunky Dildohammer
Tom Selleck: I know.

by Murdertrainacomin September 29, 2010