Fort Cumter

A deliberate act of Confederate aggression, the Fort Cumter is a surprise-attack of semenic proportions. During coitus, the male (Southern aggressor) purposefully disregards the approbations set forth under the Mason Jism line and rains cannon fire (jizzums) in his opponent's (traitorous Yankee harlot's) eyeball.

Jenny: Oh Jacob, please come on my stomach, that would be so hot!

Jacob: Quiet, Yankee fiend! The South will rise again, yeehaw! Prepare for the Fort Cumter: a full frontal assault!

<em> Jacob looses his cannons on her eyeballs, beginning the American Civil War. </em>

by J. Wellington Wimpy May 20, 2013

cumtree

Your family tree, years and years of semen that were responsible for your worthless life.

person 1: Hey man, guess what. I looked at my family cumtree and Im related to Einstein!
Person 2: No way dude!!

by spick-tacular September 22, 2017

Cumtucky windage.

The act of adjusting the flight path of a load of sperm do to wind so as to hit the intended target.

(Example 1) Fuck dude, I had to use Cumtucky windage because of the fan or it would have been a bad day for the sheets.
Cumtucky windage saved the day.

(Example 2) Boy 1 I fucked up, The wind came out of no where and it landed on the hood. No Cumtucky windage.

Boy 2 You should have used Cumtucky windage on that bitch.

by Random C April 4, 2009

Cumtach

A person, girl or boy, whom has previously given a man passionate oral sex (enough to make him jizz), but has forgotten to wipe one's upper lip, very much covered in luscious creamy semen, which is making merry with one's upper lip hairs.

Oi you cumtach! you made spill my tea!

Yes mate, she was a cumtach for a wholeweek!

Cumtaches!, Cumtaches!, Cumtaches all of them!

Micheal's was particular cumtached, because hadn't received his package in the mail

by Oxfordicktionary April 17, 2009

cumtorum

A frothy mixture of cum and blood.

I run to the bathroom and piss out cumtorum while holding in my desire to scream at 4am in the middle of the night, with my cousin in the same bed.

by cavecakes November 30, 2011

Cumtrary

When a male is being contrary around his "time of the month".

Mary: is everything okay today Bob?.
Bob: Yes Mary. Quit asking.
Mary: Aren't we a little cumtrary today. You must have pms.

by Roxy Ann Stroker August 18, 2012

Cumtwad

Its what happens when you put cheap gel in your hair and it hardens the wrong way. It makes it look like someone came in your hair and you forgot to wash it out. Making you look like an unwashed vagina.

Stooby is such a cumtwad. Look at that greasy fuck.

by DaCdawg October 10, 2014