Skip to main content

Crofter

Crofter.

Or
Crofta (for people who can't spell or are actually from the croft)

People with low self-esteem and no moral standards ofter found in scum infested council estates. Easily recognisable by a can of special brew in one hand a fag in the other and a mouth like a burnt out fuse board.
Ofcourse you stole that money out of my bag your a "crofter""crofta"

Best get to post office for my dole otherwise my lecki will run out like a proper "crofter""crofta"

What do you mean my kids are black that's just muck forgot to pay my water cause I iz a "crofter""crofta"

Wake up in the morning feeling like a "crofter""crofta" get my jobless arse outta bed for 12 walk to the postie with ma tinni pushing ma pram with ma kiddi fuck knows who the dad is could be the local Paki

What's got 500 feet and no teeth??.... the post office cue on dole day
by upperclass fuxker November 17, 2013
mugGet the Crofter mug.

crafty girl

the discreet name for someone with the illness that leads them to believe they own farm animals. Most commonly they choose goats as their imaginary farm animal. Regardless of the illness, a crafty girl is loved by all, very quick witted, charming and above all harmless.
Did you hear that lady In chat today talking about her goats???

Yes, she's crafty girl.
by Lamop February 16, 2005
mugGet the crafty girl mug.

Crafty Hetero

A heterosexual man who acts or in extreme cases pretends to actually be homosexual in order to reap the benefits afforded to homosexual men by women.
Chip: Have you noticed that Tom never actually gets with other guys on a night out?
Dave: Yeah, he's a crafty hetero for sure.
by LouisLouis November 11, 2015
mugGet the Crafty Hetero mug.

Crofter’s pie

The use of haggis as a dildo, or in the highlands of Scotland substituting haggis for lube.
“I was very lonely up on the hill so I gave my favourite sheep a crofter’s pie.”
by Wharton Halfpiece III jr. January 23, 2018
mugGet the Crofter’s pie mug.

croft fap fif

A croft fap fif is were your pussy turns into a cat and says hi
That croft fap fif fAM
by Yeehahahaha October 30, 2018
mugGet the croft fap fif mug.

craftyism

Slang. Acronym. Can’t remember a fuckin thing yet I still manage. It literally means although you have a shitty memory you do the best you can.
Dad: can you please sweep the floor, take out the trash, and clean the garage? Son: yes but can you repeat that? Dad: why? Son: I have craftyism.

Dad: what’s craftyism? Son: Can’t remember a fuckin thing yet I still manage. It literally means although you have a shitty memory you do the best you can. Dad: oh ok.
by B-rizzle June 27, 2019
mugGet the craftyism mug.

Crofted

The art of killing of a beloved character just for the hell of it.
OMG. I cannot believe they crofted Terry Dingleberry. He was my favourite.
by Alex Greed December 28, 2019
mugGet the Crofted mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email