Ass Meter 

The base unit of length in the International System of Ass Units (ASS-I). Equivalent to around 12.457 meters or the distance between Dr. Kamal's office and the BME lab.

Mike: "Hey bro, where did you park today?"

Marek: "Approximately 23.4 Ass Meters from here"

Mike: "I see what you did there you fuck!"

Ass Meter by supersubmarinesemen November 7, 2011

Ass Gab 

Stretching with your ass up in the air, after indulging in a relaxing nap or sleep for a long period of time. This stretch is usually very refreshing.

"I was so hungover this morning. When I woke up I took a nice long Ass Gab."

"That cat just took an Ass Gab."

Ass Gab by Slolex December 19, 2011

ass taint 

the flap that connects the ball sack and skin closest to the anus. (n)

Brett is an ass taint.

That girl really got his taint wet.

Shut the fuck up ass taint.

ass taint by chuck92 March 1, 2012

ass fu 

Ass fu is the fight between the smell of your feces and the smell of the feces of the person next to you in the bathroom. This also works for farts.

I was taking a dump at work the other day and a guy walked into the stall next to me. After a minute, I had to get up and leave because his ass fu was stronger than mine.

Bob cleared out the entire office the other day with his fart. His ass fu is strong.

ass fu by deathfordough June 10, 2013

ass distance 

Objects or items that are in very close distance to you, sometimes directly behind or beside the person looking for the object.

The distance between you and when you look around yourself and see your ass.

I cant find my phone charger. " well, I know where it is, it's an ass distance away from you. Check over to your right"

I'm getting great wireless signal in the house. " Thats because you are an ass distance away from the router stupid!"

ass distance by DSCone June 12, 2013

Ass Smear 

The residue left behind, after sitting one's ass on a toilet seat... It is usually composed of body sweat, pubic hairs or other body secretions.

"Gross! Somebody left a slippery, Ass Smear in the women's bathroom toilet seat, again."

Ass Smear by BeanTownBeanery September 8, 2013

Ass marbles

Similar to anal beads, they are small round objects inserted into the rectum for sexual satisfaction. They are meant to be used in moderation and are guaranteed to heighten sexual climax.

Due to insufficient anal satisfaction the homo sapien used ass marbles to enhance their sexual pleasure beyond normal constraints.

Ass marbles by Dr. Jerry Anderson October 19, 2013