Beard Madness

A short-lived surge of itch, prickling, and irritability that hits about 24–48 hours after a close shave, as stiff regrowing stubble and freshly sensitized skin team up to drive you into a slight frenzy. Typically lasts 1–4 days.

“Day-two Beard Madness has me wanting to claw my face off.”

by TwistedBobbay August 29, 2025

National Ugly Beard Day

On December 23, the barber shops are free for ugly beards.

Happy National Ugly Beard Day!

by sg_10 November 3, 2021

release beard

A beard specifically grown in preparation for getting difficult/large-scale software features live.

I've been growing this release beard in preparation for our big 1.1 release next week. I'll shave it afterward.

by E money D December 21, 2017

Super Duper Mega Bowl Volcano Blue Bearded Blumpkin

This requires 3 people. The first person is laying on the floor of a porta potty with porta potty juices in their mouth. The second person poops in the first person's mouth while receiving a blowjob from the third person. The poop splashes on the first persons face. The third person also pukes on the second person's penis. Either the second or third person smears the poop on the first person's face like football facepaint.

"Babe you want a Super Duper Mega Bowl Volcano Blue Bearded Blumpkin with my brother?"

"Yes!"

by SkibidiLomas May 1, 2024

vomit beard

When you vomit so much that it covers the outside of your mouth and looks like a beard.

Eric: "Dude, I got so drunk last night!"
Paul: "Yeah, I saw pictures on Facebook. You even had a vomit beard."
Eric: "What?!"

by Goonie Jenkins January 30, 2014

Taco beard

1. A beard so covered in taco juice that all the beard owner can smell is taco.

2. A beard that belongs to a man who just went down on a girl's bearded taco

After eating a super juicy taco, Brendan pulled his mask over his face and said "All I can smell is taco, I've got Taco Beard!"

by CaptainJabbin February 25, 2021

Shave Your Beard

To tell someone off over something pointless or ridiculous. Used when your friend is rambling about something that isn’t even your business and you just have to get him to shut the fuck up.

Ron: Yo bro! I talked to that Adrianna girl in school today. She’ll be my prom date! Isn’t this so ex-

Peter: Shave your beard, Ron.

Ron: What?

Peter: I said shave your beard Ron!

by IAmTheOneWhoShits December 9, 2024