CaptainJabbin's definitions

dick me up

When someone is bummed and needs some deep dicking to feel better. May involve opening up a dick in a jar

Jenna had a rough week at work and crashed her car. She needs a dick me up.

by CaptainJabbin January 25, 2016

tater toture

When you can see or smell tater tots but can't eat one.

Jim sent me a picture of his tater tots for breakfast. It was pure tater toture because I couldn't have a tot.

by CaptainJabbin November 18, 2016

Taco beard

1. A beard so covered in taco juice that all the beard owner can smell is taco.

2. A beard that belongs to a man who just went down on a girl's bearded taco

After eating a super juicy taco, Brendan pulled his mask over his face and said "All I can smell is taco, I've got Taco Beard!"

by CaptainJabbin February 25, 2021

comommentary

Constant Mom commentary. When Mom continuously comments about a TV show and totally prevents enjoying the show.

I was really enjoying SNL but the comommentary from Mom made it unwatchable around her.

by CaptainJabbin April 15, 2017

Pandemically permitting

Condition based on a pandemic that is placed on future plans. The condition is outside anyone's control. Similar to weather permitting

I will see you at the concert next month, pandemically permitting

by CaptainJabbin March 16, 2020

man-baleen

A mustache. Just like baleen whales use hairs to trap food, man-baleen can also be used for that purpose. See soup strainer

That guy grows a great strip of man-baleen.

by CaptainJabbin May 12, 2018