Eating Mashed Potatoes

Clean way of saying "masturbating and watching porn." The tense of "eating" can change depending on context.

Since I wasn't invited to any parties Friday night, I ended up staying home eating mashed potatoes.

by Licensed_Nerd January 12, 2022

Mashes my potatoes

Used to show appreciation, or strong like for something. Akin to floats your boat and tickles your fancy.

A positive expression, should not be confused with the likes of ‘grinds my gears’ which shows annoyance or irritation in something.

I’m a sucker for alliteration! Really mashes my potatoes you know?

Pames: I love Wes Anderson films!

Lartha: Ah they’re not for me, but whatever mashes your potatoes!

by Gasmark6Abbaxox October 17, 2020

Mashed Potatoes

To cut off your ball sack and testicles, mash them into a pulp and feed it to your sexual partner or eat it yourself.

"Did you hear that Jane ate her boyfriend's Mashed Potatoes?" "Yeah, I heard it was delicious"

by WeirdSexualStimulation September 17, 2025

Mash-Potatoing

Its the act of stuffing a condom into the lips of a vagina but not really entering.

Joe: Hey, did you actually have sex?
David: No, I was just mash-potatoing her.

by Konoyaro Bakayaro December 7, 2015

Raunchy Mashed Potatoes

What to call sex between two old people (30+) as the man is past his peak (rotten potatoes) and the woman is expired (rotten milk).

"Ew, I caught my grandparents doing the raunchy mashed potatoes!"

by raunchyrooster93 August 14, 2024

Mashing Potatoes

When your having sex with a girl and she squirts on your face then you throw up.

I was mashing potatoes last night then had to take a shower to wash the filth off .

by Doofenshmirtz1218 December 21, 2024

instant mashed potatoes

A vile, ungodly creation with no equal. The ultimate torture weapon of suburban mother's who don't like to peel potatoes or work late. A plague upon suburbia that leaves only hungry children and carnage in it's wake. A "food" dish from hell itself which can both lacerate the inside of your mouth with water-resistant flakes and also dribble out your mouth as you choke on it and beg for the gentle release of death. Generally, they're pretty terrible. Can be used to great effect in soups if you're allergic to flour though.

"Sweetie, I made instant mashed potatoes to go with dinner."
"Fuck you. I'm going out for Thai food. Eat that crap yourself."

by AC1919 December 30, 2016