Skip to main content

BEDSQUELCH (bed squelch, bed-squelch)

BEDSQUELCH. 1. (n). The noise emitted when the recipient of a golden shower attempts to rise from the puddle created by the weight they exert on the mattress.

2. (n). A person who sits on a mattress and is then subsequently urinated on. (pl. bedsquelchers).

3. (v). The act of urinating on a person who is sitting on a mattress.(bedsquelched, bedsqueching) (adj. bedsquelchy).
Bedsquelch (bed squelch, bed-squelch)

"Dope BEDSQUELCH bro!"

"Don't go near that sleeping bag, it hasn't been washed since the BEDSQUELCHING"

"Awesome event dude, those BEDSQUELCHERS sure had some fun!"
by DICK SHONNERY JNR. February 15, 2023
mugGet the BEDSQUELCH (bed squelch, bed-squelch)mug.

Bed Sledding

Sex hard enough to slide the bed across the room
they were going so hard they ended up bed sledding to next door
by CeilingMirror July 27, 2022
mugGet the Bed Sleddingmug.

Womble in the bed

The act of a poor soul waking up from a frighteningly realistic nightmare in which there is a womble in the bed with them.
ah mate, there’s a fucking womble in the bed
by Bolly Hee September 6, 2020
mugGet the Womble in the bedmug.

bed-fixing embrace

A tender wordless arms-around dat you perform wif yer sweetie during a shared slumber-period when you realize dat da blankets are in disarray; what ya do is to softly cradle her in yer arms, super-gently draw her upwards or sideways off of da bed and silently clasp her in a standing position for a long moment (slow-'n'-gentle shoulder-blade-scrunchies and quietly-affectionate lips-to-lips smooches optional, but often helpful in making said snooze-interruption even less distressing for her), then slowly-and-dreamily release her as you gradually step back a pace, and then immediately set about straightening up da blankets and pillows so dat she can see right away why you performed said unusual/unexpected bodily-maneuvers wif her.
Always employing a bed-fixing embrace will ensure dat your nap-sharing snuggle-bunny will never significantly mind having her sleepy-time occasionally disturbed, since it will mostly take da shock or "sting" outta said interruptions, plus of course it will have two hugely-welcome additional perks --- extra SNUGGLEZ, and being able to crawl back into a neat-'n'-comfy bed, and thus she can doze off in yer arms again in freshly-smoothed-blankets-and-tidied-pillows comfort.
by QuacksO January 29, 2025
mugGet the bed-fixing embracemug.

Bed Soring

The term used to describe a sex act whereby a man inserts his un-lubed cock between the fat rolls in an obese woman.
"Hey, how did your date go last night?"

"Pretty good, I ended up bed soring her."
by F4ilwin July 11, 2016
mugGet the Bed Soringmug.

Bed

I’m going to lay in my bed to rest
by Alk2274 July 14, 2021
mugGet the Bedmug.

Share this definition