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Chris Christie

Synonym for "cock-blocking", due to a related scandal in which the NJ governor shut down a bridge between NJ and NY, such that people could not pass.
Dude 1: Did you get with that girl last night?
Dude 2: Nah... her damn friend Chris Christie'd me and then they left.
Dude 1: That conniving bitch! I bet she's also a Cowboys fan!
Chris Christie by minamino2 February 18, 2015
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chris rice 

look omg hes like so chris rice

Chris TDL 

Chris TDL is a fraud thirsty for attention and approval. His real name is Christopher Alexandre Vaginite Taylor, which makes no sense because TDL doesn't correspond to any of his names.

He is so delusional that he has his own fake documentary that's not available anywhere on the Internet. He is also madly in love with Cole Spourstoute (whose performance in Riverdale is disastrous) even though he says in his various fake biographies that he is not gay.

He claims to be an extra in A Quiet Place Part 2 and John Wick 3 even though there's no evidence of that at all. And no, a fake movie review website called letterboxd doesn't count. He also claims to have worked for Apple even though he has no software engineering background and probably doesn't know the first thing about programming.

Vaginite Taylor also attempted to create a Wikipedia page about himself, but his foolish endeavor was thwarted by the website's administrators due to concerns of cross-wiki spamming by potentially paid editors. Chris should take the money he pays people to write articles about him and use them to start an actual business, that is if he's able to manage one. His one heighty one on seventy kilos/Cole Shportosche/Carrie Vanisher interview doesn't inspire much confidence.
1: What do you think of Chris TDL?
2: Who is that?
1: Oh don't you know him? I advise you to look at his documentary.
2: Ok I Will! Where can I watch it?
1: Nowhere, because it doesn't exist.
2: Oh wow, is this guy legit then?
1: No, he's just some idiot spamming the Internet because he wants everyone to think he's hot shit. But in reality, he probably lives in a basement in Buckingham.

2: That's sad. What does he do for a living then?
1: He sits around, waiting for his bien-être social cheques.
2: Who's his favorite celebrity?
1: Cole Shproschote
Evan: I have witnessed atrocities beyond your understanding.
Chris TDL by PenisTDL March 3, 2021

Chris Caldwell

One bad ass mutherfucker and French Horn Player. Don't even think about questioning his authority, even if you don't know him. He'll slap you across the face and make you spit shine the shit out of his patent leather shoes.

He's one of those guys who you just know could kick your ass. Physically, and mentally, without even giving it a second thought. To be a Chris Caldwell of the world means to be a virtual connoisseur of anything, and everything. To know everything about the modern world, and to drop musical deuces on those who piss you off.
Band kid 1: "Is that Chris Caldwell?"
Band kid 2: "Holy shit it is, let's play our notes right or he'll pour hot water on our feet and beat our asses backstage."

Janitor: "Wow the grass on the marching field sure did spring up this year!"
Drum Major: "It's because Caldwell made everyone cry so much they irrigated that shit."
Chris Caldwell by TheSoulOfgenius October 5, 2012

chris rutter

a pop punk single dad just trying to get back out there (even though he has no kids)
Chris Rutter is the whole embodiment of what Pop Punk stands for
chris rutter by thatjedikid_ December 12, 2018

Chris Cornell 

Chris Cornell (or Christopher Boyle, his birth name) was born July 20, 1965.

He was the lead singer, guitarist, and songwriter for Soundgarden, Audioslave, and Temple of the Dog.

He grew up in Seattle, Washington (considered to be the birthplace of grunge). He developed an obsession for the Beatles during his early years. During his teenage years he developed a case of depression. He spent most of this time alone at his house; drinking, playing drums, and playing guitar.

He went on to help form Soundgarden in 1984. He originally played drums and sang, but ended up playing guitar and singing. After Soundgarden's breakup in 1997, he went solo. In 2001 he formed Audioslave with the former instrumentalist's from Rage Against the Machine. Audioslave broke up in 2007.
Chris Cornell's cynical view on everyday life and his cryptic vocals give me chills.
Chris Cornell by Peppeche January 14, 2008