Optical Assault

When someone meat gazes the hell out of you.

You: I was taking a shower after working out at the gym the other day and this dude kept staring at my package.

Friend: Damn, you were the victim of an optical assault!

by Herbalicious September 28, 2008

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Optical allusion titties

When titties look bigger than they really are. Most often due to the manner in which the titties are dressed/displayed.

Dude, i was so bummed when she took her shirt off, total optical allusion titties, they were tiny.

"yeah, there not that big, there optical allusion titties" - Mello

by T-sett September 22, 2009

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Optical Solution

A response to a problem that appears to solve a problem in order to make the solver(s) look better, but doesn't actually solve a problem.

The new system increased the graduation rate to 100%. (This is an optical solution because they lowered the lowered the standards to pass, now the school looks better).
Our planes always land on time. (This is an optical solution because they added an hour to the time of flight, so the airline looks better).
We are giving you 20% off. (This is an optical solution because they raised the price 40% first, so they look like they are giving people a deal).
The school now has great test scores. (This is an optical solution because they make the exam optional, and the high scoring kids take it. Now the school looks good).

by eduwarrior January 24, 2023

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