office lightweight

A person in the office environment, who claims to put in 110% for the good of the office, can talk the talk, but struggles to walk the walk (or simply unable to achieve anything).

Peer response manifests as frustration or mocking of the said individual.

The Office Lightweight is usually a person from middle management.

Person A: "So I asked Kelvin for a day off, as my wife's in hospital. Bloody prick said no worries... my roster came out and had we working 25hrs that day....FFS"

Person B: "Yeah Kelvin is a real Office Lightweight. Next time just call in sick"

by The_Mannn September 15, 2019

first officer

When you are second in command to a legend who is the Captain but who very quickly realises that the first officer has total control

I sailed my boat as first officer before quickly becoming the captain

by J_gogo September 19, 2020

office fridge

Demon hellscape on Earth filled with rotten fish and hummus that some poor unfortunate soul has to clean annually. Or it just rots and becomes sentient.

Travis left his fucking fishdick sandwich in the office fridge and now it's grown legs and is self-aware.

by Emmie The Spiteful January 2, 2018

going into the office

Meetings and chit-chat till 12:00, pub until 15:00 then "wobbly pool" until 16:30 then home.

I'll be in bed by eight tonight I'm "going into the office" today.

by mokeyknifefight March 10, 2022

office unicorn

That girl at work who is beyond everyone you have ever met's standards because she is both ridiculously attractive and also really really nice to everyone to the point it drives you all insane. Almost always has a boyfriend who is almost always a total dick.

Max: fuck holly looks incredible today
Me: yeah she's definitely the office unicorn

by lachyisded3 July 22, 2017

Shalom officer

Used to greet the jewish officer that is hiding behind a persona of a pretty girl sharing right-wing political outlook on social media.

Pretty girl: Gun control won't do anything
Comment section: Shalom officer

by SkibitiKrzysiu82 June 22, 2024

bed office

When you are too lazy to get out of bed but somehow manage to be productive. All it takes is your laptop and a serious attempt at not getting distracted by too much porn

Hey darling, good morning! did you enjoy last night? Don't mind me, I am just going to do some work, you just relax -you dont need to get out of bed, this is my bed office, I work from here

by JoshyPoodles September 15, 2016