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A Jerk-Off Jehova Witness

noun: person: A Jerk-off Jehova Witness is somebody who only texts or calls you when he's jerking off, and doesn't ever want to actually meet. He is annoying and comes a-knocking at the times that are convenient only to them.
Mike only ever calls me when he's jerking off. I offer to make plans so we can both get off, but something always comes up. He's such a jerk-off jehova. aka. a Jerk-Off Jehova Witness
by R. Tizz-E April 9, 2024
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Related Words

luis lerado winton mortimer

receiving oral sex while shitting on a car windshield, specifically in the south western Brisbane region, eg. Toowoomba.
me and my girlfriend were in Toowoomba and she wouldn't let me do a Luis lerado winton mortimer with her, opportunity wasted...
by rupert12 May 22, 2024
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Don't record people without their consent

"Don't try to catch me molesting the retards!" ~ Kendra McKeefry (retard molester)
Hym "Sorry, what's that Matt? I couldn't hear you. Did you say something about how the guy who pretends to be me leaked a bunch of revenge porn and how you only care because it's happening to these YouTube girls? THIS IS WHY the thing I said. The thing I said was supposed to prevent shit like THAT from happening. But for that to work YOU... Have to not be a fucking retard. And even now you're trying to broaden it into do some general rule that is completely divorced from reality. Don't record people without their consent or don't distrubute porn without the permission of the people is besides the point. He wouldn't have be able to do that without your veil of silence. It wouldn't have been an issue. What she needs to do is sue destiny AND YouTube. They need to ban his ass and the assessment of everyone who knew about him INCLUDING YOU. And then they need to send me a formal apology and some asmr girls. And I will even help YouTube do it. I'll write them a complete list. You cocksuckers need to be reminded that you are ENTERTAINMENT and you are not shit beyond that. You ENTERTAINMENT. Me creator of AI."
by Hym Iam January 23, 2025
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One Eye Witness

A person who witnessed a certain situation but is biased towards the suspect.
Lisa: „I heard Noah and your boyfriend went to the club last weekend?“

Zoe: „Yes, but Noah said Clemens behaved well and did not talk to any girl at all“

Lisa: „Ok, but can you trust Noah. I think he is a one eye witness.“

Zoe: „You’re right, he’s not trustworthy at all!“
by Samsa559 July 9, 2025
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