by Hym Iam December 30, 2024
Get the Bald mug.the song man! he made jigsaw! the song! he was also one of few that overheard the conversation between charlie and pim about their boss' strange, seizure-like behavior.
the most human in the internet; and fucking hates swearing.
he has difficulty figuring out where to properly place the leftmost pedal on an automobile, but instead has a designated spot for it
the most human in the internet; and fucking hates swearing.
he has difficulty figuring out where to properly place the leftmost pedal on an automobile, but instead has a designated spot for it
by elsqued January 5, 2025
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by omnmin007 February 3, 2026
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1. A localized emergency notification issued when an elderly bald man is spotted wandering within a one-mile radius of a medical facility, usually post-colonoscopy, squinting through crooked glasses and moving at a cautious, arthritic shuffle.
2. A hyper-specific Silver Alert for a founding member of a friend group who refuses to admit his knees sound like microwave popcorn and who insists he “just needs better lighting” before every pinball game.
Symptoms may include:
• Slow, determined walk back to a parked vehicle because “it’s not that far.”
• Adjusting glasses 47 times per minute.
• Muttering about flipper lag while standing under the brightest light in the building.
• Claiming recovery is “no big deal” while gripping the handrail like it owes him money.
1. A localized emergency notification issued when an elderly bald man is spotted wandering within a one-mile radius of a medical facility, usually post-colonoscopy, squinting through crooked glasses and moving at a cautious, arthritic shuffle.
2. A hyper-specific Silver Alert for a founding member of a friend group who refuses to admit his knees sound like microwave popcorn and who insists he “just needs better lighting” before every pinball game.
Symptoms may include:
• Slow, determined walk back to a parked vehicle because “it’s not that far.”
• Adjusting glasses 47 times per minute.
• Muttering about flipper lag while standing under the brightest light in the building.
• Claiming recovery is “no big deal” while gripping the handrail like it owes him money.
“Greg just had a colonoscopy and is walking home with those bad knees. Somebody issue a Bald Alert before he tries to read street signs in the dark.”
by GuidoDaPimp February 24, 2026
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Get the Bald Teacher mug.by Offical_Balda February 24, 2025
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