shining the cannon

To masturbate, or go bashing the bish.

"I'm horny, and shining the cannon ain't good enough."

by erotica69 September 18, 2005

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shining wit

A shining wit is a person with a wonderful sense of the comedic, someone who can find the humour in everything and is always keen to see the bright side, going through life with an optimistic and sunny attitude, always ready to crack a joke to cheer his chums and other folk who have the good fortune to be in his presence..

He also does not really exist, so, is in fact the opposite of that. Much as he likes to be known as a shining wit, he is unaware of the fact that his associates refer to him as a shining wit merely to draw attention to the fact that he is such a miserable bastard that anyone who spends time with him usually ends up twitching on the end of a rope owing to induced suicidal tendancies..

In truth, shining wit is the polite spoonerist term for a WHINING SHIT.

"I had a date last evening, met a woman and she started crying after we tried to have sex and told me to go.

I couldn't understand it, I had been entertaining her all evening with tales of my ex-wife and our divorce, how she cleaned me out, turned my kids against me and left me penniless and suicidal and how greatful I was to finally meet a woman who was going to make me happy forever and stop me from taking the overdose I was planning to take if the date did not work out..

When she fell face first into her spagbol at 3.30 AM I decided she wanted to go to bed as she was tired, I dragged her upstairs and she seemed willing, but, nothing happened really because I have become impotent..

Then, she woke and seemed to be not so happy as she was when I met her..

Cant understand it, do you think Ill ever meet a good woman?"

Well mate, youre such a Shining Wit, the ladies are sure fall for your charms in the time honoured way.. Just keep taking the blue pills..

by evalson August 10, 2010

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Shining Arcanine

A super-hyper-uber conservative dumbass redneck moderator who forces his beliefs on everyone else and deflects their opinions. Refuses to believe that animals were not created for our use and attacks anyone who doesn't like Bush. Extremely lock-happy, locking anything "controversial" by his terms.

"Ruki, you watch what you say 'bout Bush 'round me."

by Ruki February 8, 2004

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