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Femorrhoid

When a woman's vagina is so prolapsed and her cervix has been so destroyed through penetration, one or more of her ovaries hang out.
Dave: "Man, Amy was such a whore that she had a femorrhoid!"

Pete: "Doesn't surprise me. I'm dead inside"
by man room May 14, 2009
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hemmorhoid

Person who is annoying or difficult to the point of being a pain in the ass; an annoying person whose presence unwanted to the extreme
My mother-in-law is a hemmorhoid and difficult to treat with anything approaching civility.
by Bert Homecky August 12, 2006
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shemorrhoid

Any person pathologically obsessed with their own ridiculous and worthless ideological judgments of language conventions which pertain (even only historically or figuratively) to sex or gender who makes a public nuisance of themselves by injecting their bullshit (as defined by H. Frankfurt) into even the most friendly and harmless conversation where they see a 'hot-button' word that sends them off into a tangential rant to "raise awareness" of their "deep" and "significant" revelations of our vocabulary and its supposedly important implications.

Symptoms include: an abnormally enlarged interest in vain masturbatory academics (such as "gender studies"); an inflamed sense of self-righteousness; irritating intellectually-vacuous outcries; a severely diminished capacity to defend opinions by reason; and disruption of normal social interactions prompted by the obsession.

Word origins: a counterstroke to the pseudo-intellectual nuisance feminists and their coinage "herstory" (a play on the word 'history', which they hysterically misjudged as androcentric): 'hemorrhoids' are a literal pain in the ass; a 'shemorrhoid' is one of the aforementioned obnoxious self-important people who is a figurative pain-in-the-ass (even in the eyes of the quasi-sensible feminists who resemble mature adults in their ability to offer arguments, coolly opening a discussion, instead of only interjecting to complain and make unreasonable demands).
person Z: having a good day?
person Y: meh. this weather is a bitch, and my boss was being a real cunt, today. You?
person X: OMG did you just say 'cunt'?
person Y: why?
person X: that's a vile word. I find it offensive. it's derisive of women and blah blah blah...
person Y: what're you on about? If I had, instead, said he was being a dickhead, I don't think anyone would complain that all penised people (of whatever gender identity) are being insulted.
person Z: lol, best to just ignore the shemorrhoid, person Y, they're only going to whine and protest for you to change your behavior, and they'll only become more rancorous if you don't bow to their self-imagined authority.
by Lykho October 31, 2011
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Femorrhoid

The woman that's always on your ass, like she's attached.
Fuck.. my wife just wont get off my ass about mowing the lawn.. shes such a femorrhoid.
by MSpar September 9, 2012
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Hemorrhoidectomy

After getting that divorce it was like a hemorrhoidectomy.
by DARTH STEELER October 13, 2013
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Calm your hemorrhoids

A term used in response to someone who is overreacting. Similar to calm down, or relax.
#1: "WHY DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME IF I'M GOING TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH?!? I told you I'd do it!!!"

#2: "Dude, calm your hemorrhoids. I was just asking."
by Danzuki February 14, 2012
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pokes my hemorroids!

'Avril Lavigne, Jamster and the New Mini all poke my hemorroids.'
by Stephen W. Thomas July 12, 2005
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