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The Cracked Voice 

- n.

1. The burlesque yet cosmopolitan literary style of Cracked.com, "America's Only Humor & Video Site, Since 1958".

2. Sarcasm of the highest art.

3. If Oscar Wilde and Dorothy Parker had a son named Freddie Mercury.
"I always picture the cracked voice coming from an awesome dude."

"I have a chemistry teacher who speaks PERFECTLY in the Cracked voice--minus swears."

"Why the fuck should you care? Oh yeah, because I said so."
The Cracked Voice by Jacopo January 6, 2010
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Cracked the Apple 

A maneuver initiated during an intimate table dance at a topless gentlemen's club aka 'shaker bar'. This maneuver begins when the female entertainer faces you directly and while in close proximity, you reach back with both hands and grab her buttocks, spreading her cheeks wide apart in a smooth, controlled and deliberate motion. Typical response to this action is pure disgust and/or expulsion from the club, and in rare cases utter enjoyment for both.
During our trip to Cabo San Lucas, Ted Cracked the Apple when he visited the Sheet Room at Mermaids.

cracked adams 

The unfortunate event where a man who loves to give blow jobs, takes on more than he can swallow resulting in a traumatized adams apple which ultimately cracks in half and nearly shatters within his throat.

Symptoms includes: Swollen Epiglottis, inability to hold a conversation beyond 20 seconds, aggressive puss sack build up in esophagus, shifted carotid artery.

These symptoms may require immediate medical attention.
Doctor - "Damn this is the 6th "Cracked Adams" case I've seen this weekend."

Nurse - "What do you expect, The Ring Hole* just opened up in gay town this week"

Doctor - "No shit! Hey I heard they have good wings."

*see defined word for description
cracked adams by dangchicago April 17, 2009

Cracked the Egg

Specific point at which something goes wrong, just as in the phrase, "jump the shark."

(Derived from Lady Gaga's Rotten Egg of a Grammy Appearance.)
The night was great, but cracked the egg when Jill decided to throw up all over those children.
Cracked the Egg by Creeparella March 3, 2011

cracked out 

adj., adv.

Referring to a physical and/or mental state of extreme exhaustion, generally coupled with any form of substance abuse (ganja, beer, or crack, of course).
I stayed up all night cracked out on ritalin and caffeine pills.
cracked out by Mike January 19, 2003
A general term used to describe a program where the security has been removed.
Q: Hey, don't you need a CD-Key for that?
A: No, it's been cracked.
cracked by Anonymous September 17, 2003

You're cracked 

A term often used by Fortnite streamers to indicate that someone is really "good" at the game. This term is usually said when one person in the Duo/Squad did a good play against other opponents. This term is mainly known because of the number of times it was overused by YouTubers/Twitch streamers FaZe Jarvis and FaZe Kay who are part of the FaZe clan.
"Bro you're cracked. Jarvis, you're insane."
"I know bro."
You're cracked by UrbanInferno June 18, 2020