mindfulness meditation

When the kind of middle aged soccer moms one would find shopping at whole foods sits in front of a guided track on YouTube or iTunes in a futile effort to connect their souls with the earth or something. They will often go berserk and hysterical if their husbands refuse to buy into the conspiracy.

Little kid: Can we go to the park?

Dad: No, your mom still has 7 hours of mindfulness meditation left.

mindfulness meditation by the large seed March 3, 2016

transientmental meditation 

A 'heightened' heightened sense of self awareness brought on by un-conscious thoughts so deep into one's own psyche as to cause the condition of schizophrenia. These people are usually only a danger to themselves, unless of course, they get elected to public office. Then they are a danger to the real world as we know it and are then to be known by the group name: Democrats.

Here's another bill introduced into Congress for a study to determine how to reduce the current wave of senseless spending by 6 Billion dollars. This bill will probably pass as it brings Trillions of dollars into the sponsor's home district required to complete the study. He must have come up with this one during a recent transientmental meditation.

transientmental meditation by ORD ELLIS September 15, 2007

PRO!meditation Murder 

The exceeding level of premeditaion murder. This type of murder is the most dangerous and well-planned.

The detectives were befuddled by the mafia due to their PRO!meditation murder tactics and couldn't pin the crime.

PRO!meditation Murder by sprgruvylama March 14, 2011

Mask Meditation 

When people in a meditative or prayerful state are unprovenly more likely to graduate to a semi-conscious or hypnotic state, or are more prone to experience a trance, if they don a face mask for paranormal or unexplainable reasons.

What percentage of masked folks who practice yoga as a transcendental activity rather than a mere breathing exercise are likely to reap the spiritual or occultic “benefits” of mask meditation?

Mask Meditation by MathPlus July 14, 2021

guided meditation

An excuse for fuckwits when there misses wont let them out

Invited the fellas for a drink. But guided meditation was calling

guided meditation by Mulox August 27, 2017

garden meditation 

Thoughtfully tending to your ladygarden; jilling off.

Lady Chatterley thought of Mellors and his John Thomas as she indulged in a little garden meditation.

garden meditation by Mavis O'Reilly June 1, 2018

masturbation meditation 

A deep state of mind that allows you to cum with nothing touching your dick/vagina.

Masturbation meditation

masturbation meditation by Reagulayte January 3, 2020