microsoft 

Software company that produces the Windows series of operating systems. Founded by Bill Gates and Paul Allen, and generally considered responsible for modern computing.

People like to knock their near-monopolistic control of the OS market but in truth, while at times unpleasant, its almost a necessity for widespread computing due to the way OS's work, and how software has to communicate with the OS. Those of you who dabbled with computing in the early '90s when many different computers/OS's on the market instead of just one know what I'm talking about; trying to find a particular piece of software compatible with your particular setup could be hell, and trying to code the stuff was even worse. Having a good compiler helped of course, but it had to be kept up to date on all the latest OS builds and/or you had to do all sorts of manual tweakage with the compiled code, neither of which was a particularly pleasant experience.

Aside from Windows, MS has released a number of things like DirectX to make programmers' lives easier. All in all they help more than they hurt.

An operating system is like the lines on the road, if everyone's not using the same one bad shit starts happening.

microsoft by C++ September 13, 2005

microsoft 

Pure Crap. The only good thing they've ever made is probably the xbox360 which is full of bugs and crashes (it's an unfinished product)

The day microsoft makes something that doesn't suck is the day they make vacume cleaners.

(bill gates)-join the corporate empire!
(geek)-yes! join microsoft
(dude)-no.
(dude2)-lol pwnd

microsoft by ivansusanin1 January 2, 2006

Microsoft 

Its both very soft to the touch and micro-sized at the same time, making it the strangest computer company in the world.

Have you seen Microsoft?

Naw, I use Apple. Its a bit sour though.

Microsoft by ClickedEnter October 19, 2020

Microsoft 

1. noun : A large company specialising in making cock-ups, and then blaming them on the user.

2. adj : Any entity, company or individual who makes a useful product which can only be used if you buy other, more expensive, products.

3 To Do A Microsoft - to sell a product, claiming that it is good value for money when, in actual fact by the time you buy the addons, it is more expensive than better versions that don't need the add-ons.

1 + 2:

User: I have been infected with a virus and have lost over £1,000 worth of work from my computer.

Microsoft: That's because you didn't buy a firewall, virus scanner, anti-spam and port blocker.

User: But the Microsoft box said the your product was safe.

Microsoft: Yes, but you didn't use it properly. When we ship the product it is set so that viruses can attack you - you should have spent a week securing it before using it. It wasn't our fault, it was your fault, so tough shit!

3. iTunes music has protection which means that it can only be used on iTunes software and ipods, retricting you enjoyment of the music to their products - they have Done a Microsoft!

Microsoft by Geordie John April 11, 2006

Microsoft 

A tiny flaccid penis.

"I saw Joe in the lockerroom today, he's got a microsoft lol".

Microsoft by MNMNMNMNMNMNMNMN January 27, 2010

microsoft 

verb - 1. to exploit through false acclaimations and monopoly share. offering a mediocre product or service under the guise that it is exceptional.

2. to use and sell another person's ideas as one's own. to forcibly steal another person's intellectual property for personal gain.

1. "Wow, it looks like, with the help of Apple, and Bellsouth, AT&T just microsofted themselves back into big business."

2. "Josh, how could you just fucking microsoft my mid-term paper like that. I trusted you!"

microsoft by Kurt Guard July 28, 2007

microsoft 

a company the soul purpose of which is to create software that kills people by inducing uncontrollable rage.

person:why did you murder the entirety of your extended family Jimmy?
jimmy:because I tried to use Microsoft software today.
person:understandable, have a great day.

microsoft by babuka October 21, 2020