When someone has an orgasm so intense it is a life-changer. In a 1999 field study of 125 people who had experienced a climax of this magnitude, 15 died of heart attacks during the orgasm, 32 swore a lifetime of devotion to their lover, 43 swore a lifetime of devotion to their hand, 23 committed suicide convinced they had experienced the ultimate thrill life could give them, 11 began touring as motivational speakers, and one decided he was going to watch the Britney Spears video "Baby, One More Time" one more time to see if he could replicate his orgasmic event. Less than a minute into the video he had a seizure and died en route to the hospital.
(from "My Date With Giganti Tongue") ...her heart skipped, she held her breathe, THERE, oh my. She felt her soul fluttering from her body in ecstasy. Her limbs shuddered and she rode the orgasm like James Bond rode the tidal wave caused by the collapsed iceberg in the one where Halle Berry wore a bikini but was trapped in that igloo by the mad Korean. Hummingbirds peppered her heart with kisses and she felt higher than Cheech and Chong at a Grateful Dead concert in a jet flying over Mount Everest. And then, as the orgasmic event slowly subsided, there was that ultimate moment of clarity when suddenly she felt she could prove Einstein's Theory of Relativity was a load of horseshit.
by theinstigator January 13, 2014
when a man spreads a woman's legs, pins them back and fucks her so hard her back cracks. This custom became so popular in the early 1980's that some enthusiasts would have spinal adjustment parties and couples would simultaneously engage in this form of boning. The combined sound of all the cracking spines gave the aural illusion of crickets chirping. The practice didn't quite reach "fad" status, though, as it really didn't sound that close to crickets chirping and it was only interesting to the bystander for a few quick moments. Eventually, the party idea died out and currently spinal adjustments are practiced in the privacy of one's home. This has been known to save dozens of dollars in chiropractor bills, cutting health costs by 0.00001%, though statistics have only been kept since Valentines Day, 2012.
Harold: Hey, Fred, what's with Steph?
Fred: Fucked her so hard last night, I gave her a spinal adjustment.
Harold: Oh, okay. That's awesome. The way she was walking, I thought she had some kind of pussy rash.
Fred: No, it was great. Had her up to five pops. Got four more on the last thrust. Adjusted!!! (high fives)
Fred: Fucked her so hard last night, I gave her a spinal adjustment.
Harold: Oh, okay. That's awesome. The way she was walking, I thought she had some kind of pussy rash.
Fred: No, it was great. Had her up to five pops. Got four more on the last thrust. Adjusted!!! (high fives)
by theinstigator December 13, 2013
When three or more people are riding in a car and they drive through a tunnel, all the windows are rolled down and everyone screams out the windows all the way through the tunnel. Their shrieking reverberates off the walls of the tunnel causing quite a ruckus.
Bum #1: Listen to those damn fools yelling out their windows!
Bum#2: They can't help it, Earl. I think they got that disease.
Bum #1: What disease, Fred?
Bum #2: That there Car Pool Tunnel Syndrome.
Bum #1: You're a fucking idiot, Fred.
Bum#2: They can't help it, Earl. I think they got that disease.
Bum #1: What disease, Fred?
Bum #2: That there Car Pool Tunnel Syndrome.
Bum #1: You're a fucking idiot, Fred.
by theinstigator September 23, 2016
1)The primal urge a woman gets deep within her clitoral vortex of sensory nerves that make her feel so carnally depraved that she seeks fulfillment in shady bars and clubs, having sex with any and every guy willing to wet their willie in the lustful lass. Her hunger goes unsatisfied as no one penis can fulfill her cockticious craving. Eventually, she may even summon up enough men to be the focal point of an all-night gangbang. Hungry Kitty isn’t satisfied until she’s been pumped full of so much man milk it leaks out and pools on the bed, gently grazing the satisfied lips of the appeased pussy.
2) When yo’ bitch want some dick.
2) When yo’ bitch want some dick.
by theinstigator June 04, 2016
A shit taken in someone's car usually in an act of revenge or defiance. Often left as a message in a poorly parked car.
Terrell played lookout while Juan took a shit the size of an axe handle in the back seat of Benny's Cadillac. When Juan finished Terrell looked in and said, "Mutha fuck! That is one big ass Detroit Burrito!"
They laughed as they left and Juan turned back one last time and yelled, "Welcome to Dee-fuckin-troit, bitch!"
They laughed as they left and Juan turned back one last time and yelled, "Welcome to Dee-fuckin-troit, bitch!"
by theinstigator September 26, 2016
When a guy is receiving a blowjob from his girl and as she attempts to deep throat him she suddenly sneezes so violently she ejects from her nose a yellowish snot trail all over his majestic manhood plus she accidentally bites his magnificent va-jay-jay impaler but it doesn’t quite draw blood.
Thanks to her allergies and missing teeth, Belinda created a hot dog with mustard, hold the ketchup situation last night on her date with Homer.
by theinstigator June 04, 2016
the presence of someone, usually female, with an incredibly nice ass which renders one unable to concentrate on work, school or any other task. Though usually affecting men, it has been known to happen to women as well.
Bill: I just marked all those 32" televisions the wrong price. The boss almost fired me.
Jim: What happened?
Bill: I was paying too much attention to the booty on that new girl in the camera department.
Jim: Oh, I could stare at that all day.
Bill: I know, but it's such an asstraction.
Jim: What happened?
Bill: I was paying too much attention to the booty on that new girl in the camera department.
Jim: Oh, I could stare at that all day.
Bill: I know, but it's such an asstraction.
by theinstigator December 14, 2013