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Definitions by sarcastic

Thanksgiving 

Modern Definition: An American tradition where people gorge on turkey until they puke and visit their relatives to eat even more turkey. Usually the stores start to get flooded with Christmas shoppers at this time.

Real meaning: Originally celebrated by the Pilgrims (early north-American settlers) as a remembrance of the time when they took full advantage of the local Native American tribes' knowledge of the land, invited them all over to a feast, slaughtered them all the next day, settled on their land, and looked westward to the vast, unconquered land that lay ahead of them.
I had barbecued pork ribs and fries on Thanksgiving day. To Hell with turkey. (heh heh heh)
Thanksgiving by sarcastic November 26, 2003

super turd

This is the most idiotic ranting I have ever seen on this site. Somebody please beat some sense into Sonyroolz. Then again, just beat the crap out of him.
I can't believe this brain-dead fanboy just called the greatest 16-bit console of all time a "Super Turd". I'll bet he has never even owned or at least rented a Super Nintendo in his life.
super turd by sarcastic November 25, 2003

candy corn 

The reason why it tastes like shit is because the candy that's left over is recycled for next Halloween. Hell, they even take the uneaten candy corn from the trash and wipe off the spit and crap.
I tried the candy corn at the party, and I puked up blood because it had expired to the point where the bacteria on it evolved into flesh-eating pathogens.
candy corn by sarcastic November 3, 2003
I still use Windows 98 beta. So far, I haven't seen this blue screen since last year, when I pulled the CD out during installation. Maybe I would have to be a code-writer or delete system files in order to see it.
Windows sucks, Linux sucks, MacOS sucks, life sucks. Just get over it and move on. Sheesh.
Windows by sarcastic October 20, 2003

captain planet

It is ironic that the show, which was supposed to be about saving the environment, is actually sponsored by a few corporations which are responsible for some of the world's pollution. It kinda negates the whole purpose of the show.
Oh shit. The wind blew the plastic wrapper of my sandwich from the table to the ground. Captain Planet is surely going to give me a half-hour lecture about reducing, reusing, and recycling.
captain planet by sarcastic October 13, 2003

Street Fighter 

A good fighting game series which spawned that god-awful Jean Claude Van Damme movie with the same name, and a fairly good anime series.
If I find Van Damme, I will kick his ass for ruining the Street Fighter universe with his shitty movie. What the fuck was he smoking to not only act the part of Guile, but to also make Guile the main character instead of Ryu.
Street Fighter by sarcastic September 12, 2003

life insurance 

The reason why women usually kill their husbands.
Miss. Smith received life imprisonment for killing her husband for the insurance money.
life insurance by sarcastic September 1, 2003