paul fleming's definitions

Maregasm

This is a horses equivalent of a orgasm. In some hick towns in America where sleeping with animals is accepted, boasting in the bar about giving your horse a "Maregasm" is quite common and completely acceptable.

Cletis: I gone and got me a new horse called Betsie, She's a beauty, it took me a while but i gave her a "Maregasm" she aint never gonna forget!
John Boy: Way ta go Cletis, you a lucky man!

by Paul Fleming July 14, 2006

RattyMouse

1. In some South American countries where small rodens are common, people struggle to differenciate between a mouse and a rat, so they use the name "RattyMouse" to describe both.
2. The description of a loveable partner or friend that has rodent like feature.

Jose: Damn man, who ate the rest of my chicken I saved last night, I was going to have it for breakfast?
Enrique: It wasn't me amigo, I saw a "RattyMouse" eating it last night, but I was too drunk on tequilla to do anything.
Jose: You drunk fool! Now I will be hungry all day because I didn't get my breakfast. It's your fault.
Enrique: I hate you!

by Paul Fleming July 14, 2006

Sex Junkie

A person who is addicted to sex. These individuals have no self respect, or respect for their family. They are often females between the age of 18 and 30. Normally these girls are carriers of sexual diseases and are often seen outside chip shops in the North West of England.

Billy: Wow, look at that girl over there, she is lovely but I bet she wouldn't even want to talk to me.
Adam: What??!! Thats Tracey, she is a "Sex Junkie", I heard she once let a whole football team go through her.
Billy: No way!! Her dad would be furious if he found out!!
Adam: If he found out?? What do you mean?? Her dad arranged it, he was the football teams manager!
Billy: Classy family then.

by Paul Fleming September 18, 2006

Whore Doctor

1. A practicing doctor who has the responsibility of treating whore's for the S.T.D's that they have picked up while sleeping with any male they can find.
2. Also the name given to an elderly gentleman who has had a huge number of female sex partners and has earned the title of being a "Whore Doctor". These gentlemen are rare and have absolutely no respect for females.

Lisa: I feel so ashamed, I have to visit the "Whore Doctor" to get rid of this dirty disease that I picked up while shagging.
Samantha: Thats terrible, I bet you will kill the guy who gave you the S.T.D when you catch up with him!
Lisa: I can't be sure which guy it was, I've narrowed it down to 7 though, because the other 5 insisted on wearing condoms.
Samantha: Do you need a lift to the clinic?
Lisa: No thanks, my husband is taking me.

by Paul Fleming August 15, 2006

whore pad

This is where a whore live. Generally found in run down areas of cities, but also found on canal barges, to give the "punter" the feeling that the earth is moving, and that they are getting value for money.

Fred: Shit man, I need to get laid, but dont want any of the emotional shit that comes with a girlfriend.
Alan: Well why don't you get down to the "whore pad" and fuck some slut, i'll even give you a lift there if you want!
Fred: Thanks, you really are a true friend!

by Paul Fleming July 9, 2006

Website Junkie

These individuals are addicted to websites. This condition often stems from the lack of a role model as a child, but can be blamed on anything from boredom, to an obsession with a particular field. The subject often visits the same sites over and over in the hope finding something new, much like a dog keeps checking his food bowl incase more food has been left for him. Normally reside in the North East of Scotland.

Kellie: Whats wrong with Simon these days? I called him last night and he said he was online and just hung up on me. It was really rude of him.
Steven: Don't take it personally, I was talking to his Mum and she said the phsychiatrist diagnosed him as a "Website Junkie". He just can't keep away from the internet.
Kellie: Oh, I thought he was just fucking rude.

by Paul Fleming July 12, 2006

boomerang whore

These girls are native to, but not exclusive to small towns in the Eastern Counties of England. As with any whore, they are willing to give up sex at anytime, but a boomerang whore will let her partner have sex with her, then her sister, then her best friend, then her mother, and then she will let you come back to her and have sex once again. Just like a boomerang, she will keep coming back to you, regardless of how you treat her.

Liz: Why do you let Brian come back and have sex with you, he fucked your mum, your sister, and even though i'm your best friend, he fucked me! He thinks he can get away with it because he says you are a "boomerang whore".
Jannine: Yeah, I know, I just love him so much.
Liz: You make me sick.

by Paul Fleming July 9, 2006