pantaloon's definitions
A form of torture created by Pontius Pilate, the man who crucified the savior. It's not as easy as you might think. St. Paul was certified in Pilates and Advanced Spin. The original 12 wanted to emphasize diet (bread, wine, omega 3s from fish oil, etc.) This caused quite a schism as you might imagine. This went on for awhile, until the Serfing craze caught on with the Barbarian invasion of Ringo, George, Cedric, and Dagobert.
After the crucifixion,a lot of fitness buffs tried to jump on the band wagon so Pilate was forced opened a gym (Pilates Fitness, inc.) at the local coliseum and hire some trainers. The gold members were given the "Martyr" card.
by Pantaloon January 18, 2008
Get the pilates mug.Jasmine thought the thong would erase her unsightly panty lines, but she forgot that she also was foregoing the smoke screen her panties afforded her. The tacos she had for lunch produced shrapnel that the thong was unprepared to deal with.
by Pantaloon February 5, 2008
Get the smoke screen mug.The name of Arnold Schwarzenegger's grade school lover from his early days in Austria. During the filming of "The Terminator," AS was reported to be still distraught, even years later, over the bitter ending of this romance, and was forever uttering the boy's name. James Cameron, in perhaps one of the most brilliant moments in cinema history, decided to put one outtake into the film, where they were adjusting the lighting, and Arnold was waiting simply waiting on his mark for the next take. This moment captured on film is perhaps the quintessential expression of Man's existential aloneness in the universe, and AS's eventual destruction of the set in the name of Albee seems only fitting in retrospect.
by Pantaloon January 19, 2008
Get the albee beck mug.Track marks left by underpants rubbing against a soiled starfish. Similar to skid marks, but lighter brown color. Almost beige. Possibly due to differences in diet from those who produce skid marks. Some studies have been done, but nothing conclusive has been published as this goes to print.
Girl, glancing at the floor- You don't have a hash mark in your boxers.
Fellow-You seem surprised.
Girl- Oh, most of the guys that come in here have them. 19 out of 20, I'd say.
Fellow, puffing out his chest- Well, then, thank you much. Is that what I smelled walked in here?
Girl-No, that's just my upper lip, from the Dirty Sanchez I had for breakfast.
Fellow- I thought you said I was your first!
Girl-Oh, yeah, you're right. I guess I must have just shit myself.
Fellow, relieved- Oh, Thank God!
Fellow-You seem surprised.
Girl- Oh, most of the guys that come in here have them. 19 out of 20, I'd say.
Fellow, puffing out his chest- Well, then, thank you much. Is that what I smelled walked in here?
Girl-No, that's just my upper lip, from the Dirty Sanchez I had for breakfast.
Fellow- I thought you said I was your first!
Girl-Oh, yeah, you're right. I guess I must have just shit myself.
Fellow, relieved- Oh, Thank God!
by Pantaloon January 16, 2008
Get the hash mark mug.The act of squeezing off a few fresh finless brown trout into the bowl. Essential for the overall health of the ecosystem.
He hadn't shat for days, but the water would be teaming with fresh finless browns when he went to stock the pond.
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
Get the stock the pond mug.1) Verb meaning to take a golf club and swat at someone's testicles (ala Johnny Carson)
2)The act of holding someone's balls to the forehead in order to concentrate (ala JC's Carnac the magnificent)
3)A means to get a new car advocated by Toyota.
2)The act of holding someone's balls to the forehead in order to concentrate (ala JC's Carnac the magnificent)
3)A means to get a new car advocated by Toyota.
1)I passed out on the floor of my frat house and awoke just before Weber gave me a carson. I fled through the pantry door with my morning wood intact.
2)I wouldn't say I was her fuck buddy per see. Sure, I got off, but I was starting to suspect that she needed to think, and was only waiting till I slept before she carsoned me.
3)That Toyota Prius is looking sweet. What would the total carbon output be if I were to carson my subaru?
2)I wouldn't say I was her fuck buddy per see. Sure, I got off, but I was starting to suspect that she needed to think, and was only waiting till I slept before she carsoned me.
3)That Toyota Prius is looking sweet. What would the total carbon output be if I were to carson my subaru?
by Pantaloon January 14, 2008
Get the carson mug.1)a form of petty thievery where the thief has a limited amount of time before he must flee the scene, and so maximizes this opportunity by breaking the glass of a storefront or display and grabbing as much loot as is possible in a single swoop. Often a shattered mess is what remains of the scene.
2)George W. Bush and Dick Cheney's Domestic and Foreign Policy. Substitute the words " the glass of a storefront or display" with either "Iraq,""The Planet," or "The American People."
2)George W. Bush and Dick Cheney's Domestic and Foreign Policy. Substitute the words " the glass of a storefront or display" with either "Iraq,""The Planet," or "The American People."
1) The proprietors had it coming. They were just begging for a good ol' smash and grab.
2)Substitute "Iraq", "The Planet," "The American People," "our grandchildren," for the word "proprietors." in the above sentence.
2)Substitute "Iraq", "The Planet," "The American People," "our grandchildren," for the word "proprietors." in the above sentence.
by Pantaloon January 15, 2008
Get the smash and grab mug.