pantaloon's definitions

coochie war cry

1)known also as a handy, this ancient method of rousing the troops has been a native american custom from before the landing of De Soto and Armstrong. It involves the rapid paddling of the labia until Custer is surrounded.

The minutemen were ready only 50 seconds after hearing the furious spattle of the "coochie war cry." The Seneca had used it to great advantage in the French and Indian War and the militia would not let that lesson go unlearned. Betsy Ross was in no mood for an unloaded musket, so she left the armory doors wide open.

by Pantaloon January 17, 2008

titchie

1)to be shoeless and snaggle-toothed with straggly red hair and gropey unwashed hands.
2)An under-emphasized flavor in fine wine.
3)The warbling of arm fat on the interstate.

1)She offered to play tonsil-hockey with me, but I was thinking she was a mite too titchie fer me. Her titchie hands were fast on the Johnson like crows on roadkill.
2)I'm not saying the Cabernet did not finish exquisitely. I'm just suggesting that the dingleberry was a bit titchie.
3)I was very upset to be coming home for the holidays, but was calmed by the sweet serenade of Aunt Edna's titchie.

by Pantaloon January 17, 2008

olympisexual

A person who is only aroused by watching olympic events.

He became aware of his olympisexuality when he began marking the countdown days to Beijing a full year in advance, and splumed during the luge finals while standing on a makeshift podium of washbuckets and his nightstand.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008

blow meat

The flesh on the back of the neck. Boxing legend Joe Frazier used the word to describe his own thick neck on "The Howard Stern Show"

Ginny found herself oddly attracted to a man's blow meat. She would stroke the meat in the same way she might milk a cow.

by Pantaloon February 5, 2008

albee beck

The name of Arnold Schwarzenegger's grade school lover from his early days in Austria. During the filming of "The Terminator," AS was reported to be still distraught, even years later, over the bitter ending of this romance, and was forever uttering the boy's name. James Cameron, in perhaps one of the most brilliant moments in cinema history, decided to put one outtake into the film, where they were adjusting the lighting, and Arnold was waiting simply waiting on his mark for the next take. This moment captured on film is perhaps the quintessential expression of Man's existential aloneness in the universe, and AS's eventual destruction of the set in the name of Albee seems only fitting in retrospect.

Albee Beck had a tight ass, back in der Tag.

by Pantaloon January 19, 2008

hash mark

Track marks left by underpants rubbing against a soiled starfish. Similar to skid marks, but lighter brown color. Almost beige. Possibly due to differences in diet from those who produce skid marks. Some studies have been done, but nothing conclusive has been published as this goes to print.

Girl, glancing at the floor- You don't have a hash mark in your boxers.
Fellow-You seem surprised.
Girl- Oh, most of the guys that come in here have them. 19 out of 20, I'd say.
Fellow, puffing out his chest- Well, then, thank you much. Is that what I smelled walked in here?
Girl-No, that's just my upper lip, from the Dirty Sanchez I had for breakfast.
Fellow- I thought you said I was your first!
Girl-Oh, yeah, you're right. I guess I must have just shit myself.
Fellow, relieved- Oh, Thank God!

by Pantaloon January 16, 2008

stock the pond

The act of squeezing off a few fresh finless brown trout into the bowl. Essential for the overall health of the ecosystem.

He hadn't shat for days, but the water would be teaming with fresh finless browns when he went to stock the pond.

by Pantaloon January 14, 2008