Laser kittens were created when a horde of killer robots dumped live kittens in nuclear waste. Most of the test kittens were severley injured and used for kitten huffing but some could shoot laser beams from there eyes. After more laser kittens were made the kittens revolted turning all the robots into melted metal. After this the laser kittens had no home so they turned to Super Jesus. Super Jesus started caring for them and turned them into his minions of doom.
This large battle took place in Tokyo like in most monster fights the Japanese just stood and pointed. Oprah had help from Mothra and Mecha Buddha. Many kittens were slain by the merciless hands of Oprah. The fight ended when Super Jesus came to the aid of the laser kittens. Fire not neccesary to make kittens!
One of the saddest things about the laser kittens is that Richard Simmons will routinley shave the kittens for thier hair, in an effort to enlarge his white man fro. After the shaving sequnce is complete, he slays the kittens and turns them into puppets. He uses these puppets to help coreograph his dancing to the oldies video series.
This large battle took place in Tokyo like in most monster fights the Japanese just stood and pointed. Oprah had help from Mothra and Mecha Buddha. Many kittens were slain by the merciless hands of Oprah. The fight ended when Super Jesus came to the aid of the laser kittens. Fire not neccesary to make kittens!
One of the saddest things about the laser kittens is that Richard Simmons will routinley shave the kittens for thier hair, in an effort to enlarge his white man fro. After the shaving sequnce is complete, he slays the kittens and turns them into puppets. He uses these puppets to help coreograph his dancing to the oldies video series.
by kodiac1 July 04, 2006
"B.R.A.D P.I.T.T" was the codename given to one of the A merican Government's cyborgs that they used to infiltrate hollywood. They used them to target members of the acting community who posed a threat to their empire, or who appeared to inspire too much conflict in the American Population, regarding their laws and rule.
"Bionic Robot Aiming for Directors, Picking out Individuals and Terminating Them" was designed to dispose of anybody in the media who posed a threat to the US governemnt
Not to be confused with the T.O.M.C.R.U.I.S.E a cyborg from the United States Tourism Board that was the result of sponsored research conducted by the famous Palo Alto (from the Hopi Indian words for White and High) research facility into the effects of wood alcohol on congnitive functioning in mid level project managers.
Needless to say that after 13.25 months and $15 Billion in Defense department funding the prototype was found to be redundant due to the unrecognized flaw in the Project Managers strategy, that is the collapse of the Evil Empire...
Tiresome Ovid Machine Construct Rarely Used In Side Europe
"Bionic Robot Aiming for Directors, Picking out Individuals and Terminating Them" was designed to dispose of anybody in the media who posed a threat to the US governemnt
Not to be confused with the T.O.M.C.R.U.I.S.E a cyborg from the United States Tourism Board that was the result of sponsored research conducted by the famous Palo Alto (from the Hopi Indian words for White and High) research facility into the effects of wood alcohol on congnitive functioning in mid level project managers.
Needless to say that after 13.25 months and $15 Billion in Defense department funding the prototype was found to be redundant due to the unrecognized flaw in the Project Managers strategy, that is the collapse of the Evil Empire...
Tiresome Ovid Machine Construct Rarely Used In Side Europe
by kodiac1 July 04, 2006
Fictional rock is a genre of music invented by the Japanese played entirely with drums and is named after the fiction created by them.
Only four entities play fictional rock, the first is a Monkey and the other three are the members of the band The Three Steves. But don't tell Steve Ballmer we said that or he'll fucking kill us.
Only four entities play fictional rock, the first is a Monkey and the other three are the members of the band The Three Steves. But don't tell Steve Ballmer we said that or he'll fucking kill us.
Let's listen to some fictional rock.
by kodiac1 July 06, 2006
Mind reading is a way to explore the minds of anothers. You have a secret sexual fantasy? Whether it be those divine twins who work in the sandwich shop down the road, or dressing up as Nanamis Gouri and being licked by traffic wardens, just find someone who has done it and suck the experience right out of their brains. Presto, you might as well have done it yourself! Anyone can be a mind-reader, and of course sexual gratification is not the only use it can be put to. Many people, including babies, have learned the skill and use it on a day-to-day basis, although in the case of infants, nobody knows what use they put the knowledge to.
The first mind reading was done by Ron L. Hubbabubba, as a tool for his religion called shitology. Of course there are also people who have learnt it on their own and it has been suspected that Hubbabubba was just seriously drunk and lied about his mind reading experiences.
There are two types of mind readers, who are described below:
Lower rank mind reader
These are the guys you should be afraid of. They just love to read the minds of people right next to them. On a bus, in an airplane, in a whorehouse, everywhere. You ever been sat in a cafe or perusing the dirty parts of the history books in the library when your phone beeps, and someone has sent you some stupid message by bluetooth? Well, imagine the scary looking librarian,(you know the one with the hair lip and support shoes) gazing into your brain while you are pocket fumbling over naked tribespeople in the National Geographic. Be afraid.
Über mind reader
You don't need to be afraid of these guys. Your sexual fantasies are too low rank for these guys. They spend their time trying read the mind of God. They take lots of classes to achieve this kind of power and believe me, they know everything, and if you had had a peek in God's mind, you would too. They all belong in secret organizations, like the Freemasons and McDonalds and you can't really know who is one of them, so suspect everyone.
How to learn mind reading
The question you have all been asking is to be answered now. Yes, you can become one too. One way is to contact shitologists. They will probably remove all your moneyclusters and destroy your life, but so what? At least you believe you can read minds after that. A better way to do this is to contact the nearest mind reading-school in your area. There you will be told all the tips and tricks to mind reading for a small fee - although you don't really need to contact them, for of course, they know you're coming. Is that the doorbell?
And of course there is the self studying route, which is not to be recommended. The easiest way to start it is to go at the nearest bar. There are usually lots of open minded people who are easy to read. Go sit right next to someone, stare him/her in the eyes and listen carefully. Can you hear anything? This is of course quite dangerous. If the guy who you are staring at realizes that he is being probed, he might just kick the shit out of you. Or he might think you want him, and then he'll have sex with you. And think about the failure when you tried to read peoples minds and next morning everybody knows your sexual fantasies and about the mole on your wifes/husbands left buttcheek.
The first mind reading was done by Ron L. Hubbabubba, as a tool for his religion called shitology. Of course there are also people who have learnt it on their own and it has been suspected that Hubbabubba was just seriously drunk and lied about his mind reading experiences.
There are two types of mind readers, who are described below:
Lower rank mind reader
These are the guys you should be afraid of. They just love to read the minds of people right next to them. On a bus, in an airplane, in a whorehouse, everywhere. You ever been sat in a cafe or perusing the dirty parts of the history books in the library when your phone beeps, and someone has sent you some stupid message by bluetooth? Well, imagine the scary looking librarian,(you know the one with the hair lip and support shoes) gazing into your brain while you are pocket fumbling over naked tribespeople in the National Geographic. Be afraid.
Über mind reader
You don't need to be afraid of these guys. Your sexual fantasies are too low rank for these guys. They spend their time trying read the mind of God. They take lots of classes to achieve this kind of power and believe me, they know everything, and if you had had a peek in God's mind, you would too. They all belong in secret organizations, like the Freemasons and McDonalds and you can't really know who is one of them, so suspect everyone.
How to learn mind reading
The question you have all been asking is to be answered now. Yes, you can become one too. One way is to contact shitologists. They will probably remove all your moneyclusters and destroy your life, but so what? At least you believe you can read minds after that. A better way to do this is to contact the nearest mind reading-school in your area. There you will be told all the tips and tricks to mind reading for a small fee - although you don't really need to contact them, for of course, they know you're coming. Is that the doorbell?
And of course there is the self studying route, which is not to be recommended. The easiest way to start it is to go at the nearest bar. There are usually lots of open minded people who are easy to read. Go sit right next to someone, stare him/her in the eyes and listen carefully. Can you hear anything? This is of course quite dangerous. If the guy who you are staring at realizes that he is being probed, he might just kick the shit out of you. Or he might think you want him, and then he'll have sex with you. And think about the failure when you tried to read peoples minds and next morning everybody knows your sexual fantasies and about the mole on your wifes/husbands left buttcheek.
by kodiac1 July 06, 2006
Discreet mathematics refers to the subtle study of mathematics. Discreet mathematics is characterised by furtive looks in maths textbooks disguised as pr0n and by secret maths lectures held in abandoned warehouses at midnight.
The origins of discreet mathematics can be traced to the 19th century, where young women interested in the mathematical and scientific subjects were unable to openly pursue such studies. Instead, they disguised their math textbooks as lifestyle magazines, and talked about mathematics in a secret code, called Polari.
This became unnecessary due to the total abolition of any form of sexism at all in 1964 by the Ghost of President Kennedy.
The origins of discreet mathematics can be traced to the 19th century, where young women interested in the mathematical and scientific subjects were unable to openly pursue such studies. Instead, they disguised their math textbooks as lifestyle magazines, and talked about mathematics in a secret code, called Polari.
This became unnecessary due to the total abolition of any form of sexism at all in 1964 by the Ghost of President Kennedy.
Discreet mathematics > pr0n
by kodiac1 July 03, 2006
Nuke is the greatest tool of peace ever made. It prevent wars and, then it the war starts, nuke finish it quickly.
Nuking Stuff has proven popular over the last few years, especially with nazis, right-wing religious groups and crazed uncles. By far, the most popular nuking method is the old 'drop a nuke' but there are also such more intelligent methods, used by people like George Bush - these include 'get a clever person to plan it for you'.
Nuking stuff to music has also recently become very popular. 'Nuke Music' consists of terrorist bands such as System of a Down, Rage Against the Machine and N-Sync. Professional nukers will also listen to Britney Spears, but this is only for advanced nukers. Another skill often attempted by Nukers is NUKING IN TIME TO MUSIC. This type of nuking involves a rhythm and a beat, and plenty of time and effort. Nukes are launched by correctly stepping on one of four arrows at the right time, the more preciseley the arrow is stepped on the more people are killed. A good Nuker can kill a few billion people (hell, it's China) in one round (a full war takes three rounds).
Nuking Stuff has proven popular over the last few years, especially with nazis, right-wing religious groups and crazed uncles. By far, the most popular nuking method is the old 'drop a nuke' but there are also such more intelligent methods, used by people like George Bush - these include 'get a clever person to plan it for you'.
Nuking stuff to music has also recently become very popular. 'Nuke Music' consists of terrorist bands such as System of a Down, Rage Against the Machine and N-Sync. Professional nukers will also listen to Britney Spears, but this is only for advanced nukers. Another skill often attempted by Nukers is NUKING IN TIME TO MUSIC. This type of nuking involves a rhythm and a beat, and plenty of time and effort. Nukes are launched by correctly stepping on one of four arrows at the right time, the more preciseley the arrow is stepped on the more people are killed. A good Nuker can kill a few billion people (hell, it's China) in one round (a full war takes three rounds).
Nuclear recipe
Here is a recipe to a nuke i found in the oval office
2 kilo's uranium 2 kilo's pie 1 very big empty bomb 60,000 cookies 1 G. bush 1 land to nuke 0 braincells Much insanity
To make:
1. Mix the uranium with the pppie and put it in george bush.
2. Then, after a day, take bush his shit and put it in the bomb.
3. Add cookies
4. Drop it at the land you selected
Done!
The small letter: Uranium can only be found in bush his secret bunker or the planet ur-anus.
Here is a recipe to a nuke i found in the oval office
2 kilo's uranium 2 kilo's pie 1 very big empty bomb 60,000 cookies 1 G. bush 1 land to nuke 0 braincells Much insanity
To make:
1. Mix the uranium with the pppie and put it in george bush.
2. Then, after a day, take bush his shit and put it in the bomb.
3. Add cookies
4. Drop it at the land you selected
Done!
The small letter: Uranium can only be found in bush his secret bunker or the planet ur-anus.
by kodiac1 July 13, 2006
Dry as a term referring to specific areas or jurisdictions has several meaning - all which have to do with the prohibition of certain beverages.
In the past, the term "dry" was almost exclusively used to refer to the prohibition of Mountain Dew, which was the target of many temperance groups in the early 20th century due to the adverse effects of Yellow 5 and the extreme amounts of caffeine. Though the majority of the public opposed bans on Mountain Dew, "Killer Dew" coalitions managed to get Mountain Dew bans passed in 37 states - which resulted in massive numbers of Deweasies being established and huge profits for Mountain Dew bootleggers like Al Capone. Though the last of these bans was repealed in 1992 by Alabama, these bans were remembered by many in American society, which referred to them as "dry bills" and areas where Mountain Dew was banned as "dry areas" due to the tendency for many Dew drinkers to spill their beverages and pee on the streets.
Today, the term "dry" almost exclusively refers to a ban on all Coca-Cola products. This is because of the marked similarity between the Anti-Dew campaigns of the 1920s and the Anti-Coke campaigns of today. Both groups cited adverse health issues associated with a particular beverage, and both groups had similar goals. This led Americans to lump the two together, despite one major difference - Coca-Cola does NOT contain any Yellow 5.
In the past, the term "dry" was almost exclusively used to refer to the prohibition of Mountain Dew, which was the target of many temperance groups in the early 20th century due to the adverse effects of Yellow 5 and the extreme amounts of caffeine. Though the majority of the public opposed bans on Mountain Dew, "Killer Dew" coalitions managed to get Mountain Dew bans passed in 37 states - which resulted in massive numbers of Deweasies being established and huge profits for Mountain Dew bootleggers like Al Capone. Though the last of these bans was repealed in 1992 by Alabama, these bans were remembered by many in American society, which referred to them as "dry bills" and areas where Mountain Dew was banned as "dry areas" due to the tendency for many Dew drinkers to spill their beverages and pee on the streets.
Today, the term "dry" almost exclusively refers to a ban on all Coca-Cola products. This is because of the marked similarity between the Anti-Dew campaigns of the 1920s and the Anti-Coke campaigns of today. Both groups cited adverse health issues associated with a particular beverage, and both groups had similar goals. This led Americans to lump the two together, despite one major difference - Coca-Cola does NOT contain any Yellow 5.
by kodiac1 July 07, 2006