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NASA

NASA originally stood for the "National Anal Sex Association". Now NASA stands for the "Nutty Assholes in Space Authority", having changed its focus from bedrooms to the sky. They're still fuckin' anal, though!
NASA was really created as an attempt to fool people into thinking America reached Venus (as Europe did first). It failed to live up to the expectations of NACA.
by kodiac1 July 11, 2006
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Buckingham Palace

Welcome to Buckingham Palace, the biggest playground existing, where even Queen Elizabeth and Tony Blair come to play! Here, your kids and grandparents can enjoy a dive in the bath where the balls connect and the world famous enormous pole of exitement(one of Tony's favourites)! Let's have a quick tour, shall we?

Parking lot

Our parking lot is THE place if you like waiting! We have one-hundred lazy guards who are willing to tell you bad directions! Our guards also provide badly drawn maps, keys that don't fit and dirtroad detours!

The entrance

When you finally reach the entrance, the fun begins! You can look at two Buckingham Guards... TOTALLY STANDING STILL! Isn't that amazing, kids!? You can kick them and THEY WILL REMAIN STILL! You can test your new collection of BeyBlades and they will STILL STAND STILL! You can even shoot them in the crotch with a 9mm gun, and surprisingly enough THEY WILL REMAIN STILL!!! AMAZING!

The staircases

Now here comes a fun part. When you're inside, there are loads of stairs, covered in red carpet! You can run up them, run down, you can CLIMB then, you can jump off them or break your ankle on them! Once you're finished, you can go to the...

First aid room

The first aid room is only 5 miles away from the Parking lot, so you can take your time and let that ankle heal there! Tony Blair will look after you! Be sure to have your buttplug with you, as Tony knows a few tricks!

The Queen's room

Legends and myths are told that there's a secret room inside the castle where Queen Elizabeth used to do her dirty laundry. Try to find it, lead us to it and get a FREE* icecream cone!

(*)Only available when you have collected all of our tax money for us. It's a hard job, you know...

History Lessons!

In here, you can play several games, like "Kampf" or "Gulf War"! Most of them can be unlocked by succesfully surviving the other games without scratches and maimed body parts! Some of the history teachers include Adolf Hitler, Bill Clinton and George W. Bush (Only for the war in Iraq. He lacks knowledge of all other subject, although we doubt he knows anything about Iraq, too...)
Buckingham Palace is a fun place to go for a typical father-and-son-day! The whole family can enjoy the pleasures of Tony Blair and the old demented whore who calls herself a queen! Have fun, and don't forget the buttplug!
by kodiac1 July 6, 2006
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King Butthole the 3rd

In the year 1903, King Butthole the 3rd was born into kingship after his mother died in labor and his dad got wasted and set himself on fire. From the year 1903 to 1907, Austria was ruled by a baby. While under the baby's rule the country went to war with Godzilla and the United Arab Emirates.

In the year 1907 the King went to preschool. After the first day he declared war on finger paints and naptime. Finger paints suffered after the king used his nuclear capabilities on the crayola fingerpaint warehouse in Mongolia. But the king let naptime escape with it's life.
In the year 1957 the king bought the company who made Better Homes and Gardens magazine and made it into his military headquarters. With his base set up the King decided to build the great fort wallacocky made entirely of popsicle sticks.

The fort soon was destoyed in World war 2.5 and the King died in battle.

After dying the Austrian stock market collapsed and nobody goes there anymore. THE END!
“The Irish flag dips to no earthly butthole.”

~ Oscar Wilde on King Butthole the 3rd
by kodiac1 July 6, 2006
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telephoto

Telephoto is commonly referred to telephoto lenses (or tele), for SLRs and some point and shoot cameras. Telephoto lenses on SLRs could range from the mild 100mm to strong 600mm, or even 800-1600mm, with a teleconverter. Tele lenses tend to be very large, depending on how fast they are and thier focal length. Canon's L-series "white lenses" seen at sporting events are commonly f/2.8 for 400mm, or f/4 for 600mm (there are tons of focal lengths and apertures in between). Common optical problems that plague most teles are vignetting, barrel distortion, Pincushion distortion, and chromatic aberration (also known as purple fringing). Most telephoto lenses, and all fast ones, are very expensive. There are cheap ones out there, like the Nikkor 70-300 f/4-5.6G (which you could easily get for about $170). But if you want a pro quality paparazzi/sports style lens like Canon's 600mm f/4L IS USM, you'll have to invest a little under $9000.
Although expensive, telephoto lenses are really fun to shoot! Sell a kidney!
by Kodiac1 April 27, 2007
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Scandinavia

Scandinavia was a conspiracy theory developed by the Soviets in the 1640s. The only parties falling for this April's Day prank were Sweden, Norway and John Kerry. Denmark, Iceland and Finland have often been accused of being part of Scandinavia, but they deny these allegations. Denmark says that they were just playing along and knew all along that it was just a joke.

The Soviet government claimed that Scandinavia was a happy group of countries that did not want to be part of the Cold War or any major global political decision. Early membership benefits included free health care and education without oppressive government. Not to be outdone by commies, USA founded Canada.

After the fall of the Berlin wall, western historians were given access to the Soviet plans of this conspiracy. Later it was revealed that the initial plans were written on a dirty napkin from Hard Rock Cafe in Paris, France.

On most maps, Scandinavia appears as a large nut sack teabagging Europe. Scandinavia's major exports are porn, Volvos and sex-change operations. Major imports are Sun, bikinis and early episodes of MacGyver.
In Scandinavia it tends to be cold so bring a blanket.
by kodiac1 July 5, 2006
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Emo Bingo

Emo Bingo is the rather hardcore game of bingo, now played instead of Goth Bingo, due to the fact that the suicidal cliche has now been usurped from the Goth movement.

You and your friends (Ha! Yeah, right.) should gather around a computer and open up your internet browser of choice. Here, you should lay down the following ground rules:

1. Determine which blogging spaces are allowed (MySpace, Xanga, etc.).
2. Optionally choose a selection filter (Celebrities, <18, "tweens", blondes, emo hair, etc.).
3. Randomly generated your Emo Bingo card using the Emo Bingo Generation Program.
4. Determine how much alcohol is to be consumed (minimum or maximum) between rounds. Because you're going to need alcohol to withstand their emo radiation.

The card is divided into 5 collumns, each with a specific theme.

* B: B is for Bitching, which is what they do. About everyone. Seriously.
* I: I is for Illiterate, which is what they are. This column asks for their writings.
* N: N is for No Taste. This column is for their music choices.
* G: G is for Graphics. Unfortunately, they won't cut themselves and leave something graphic enough.
* O: O is for Original, which is what they think thier names are. Prove them wrong.

For more fun, play for patterns (the Square, the Tee, the Cross, the X), play cards back to back, simultaniously. Furthermore, if this is not enough to satisfy you, you can play "Fake the Emo" bingo, in which you start accounts in order to confuse emos into believing your lies. Whoever gets the first fatality wins! Yay!
by kodiac1 July 9, 2006
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Wtf

WTF (Windows Text File) is a plain-text file format developed by Microsoft. It is intended for storing text information in readable form. Many users report problems opening it, because most systems don't know what to do with the .wtf file extension. The resulting error messsage "WTF? Unknown file extension!" is widely known. The chat acronym WTF is commonly used to signify uncertainty or unpleasant surprise.

As part of Microsoft's effort to develop free, open, user-friendly software environments, it is constantly improving file formats. After WMV (Windows Media Video) and (WMA - Windows Media Audio), it published proposals for WMP (Windows Media Picture) and WTF (Windows Text File) in May, 2006.

"WTF?" is the usual response by many users, who are not sure how Microsoft intends to compete with TXT format. Microsoft's release timeline calls for the TXT format to be made obsolete within months, by disallowing Windows Vista to open .txt files.
System Requirements

* '$30.00' license fee for usage
* Cheese grater
* 76 IQ maximum (any more and KERNEL32 takes a dive)
wtf
by Kodiac1 December 12, 2006
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