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jsd9632's definitions

dick life support

A male with barely enough brain function to pump blood to keep his penis alive.
A means of transportation for an erection .
A very stupid male who's only reason for existing is to knock up bimbos.
A porn actor.
Kevin Federline.
Sally: " Did you hear? Susie got knocked up!"
Betty: " Which one of her brain dead dick life support boyfriends did it?"
Sally: " The one that looks like Kfed."
Betty: " It is amazing he can muster the brain power to get an erection."
by jsd9632 January 7, 2012
mugGet the dick life supportmug.

ticket to heaven

In the movies when a bad person sacrifices himself to save others it is said that he has purchased his ticket to heaven.

The last minute self sacrifice to protect an innocent from an untimely death with no hesitation or concern for your own well being is to earn a ticket to heaven.
The bad guy took a bullet to save the girl thus buying his ticket to heaven.
by jsd9632 March 31, 2012
mugGet the ticket to heavenmug.

tasty tart

A cute girl.
A cute slutty girl.
A cute girl who tastes really sweet.
A cute tasty girl with a really pretty pussy.
A cute girl with a tasty pussy.
A cute girl who like to flirt and flash.
Krissy is one tasty tart!
by jsd9632 August 17, 2012
mugGet the tasty tartmug.

functioning homosexual

A functioning homosexual is a gay person who has not given
thier life over to the drama associated with their sexual orientation.
A homosexual who can pass as straight when the need arises.
Someone like Will on Will and Grace.
Gay Dude 1: It's amazing how calm Bob was when Brucie had
his meltdown at the GLT meeting last night.
Gay Dude 2: Bob is very good at keeping it together, he is quite
the functioning homosexual.
by jsd9632 December 18, 2011
mugGet the functioning homosexualmug.

reality retard

Someone too stupid to tell what's real and what's not.
Someone who believes everything is factual that they see on reality TV shows.
Someone who believes what they see on History Channel is fake and E! is real.
A person of low intelligence who lives in a fantasy world.
My reality retard sister can't get enough of the reality shows.
by jsd9632 March 7, 2012
mugGet the reality retardmug.

Harley Dick

A very short penis belonging to a insecure male who is
overcompensating by riding a Harley.
Badass Bob had to eat out the biker trash girl because his Harley Dick wasn't getting the job done.
by jsd9632 January 11, 2012
mugGet the Harley Dickmug.

pound sand up your ass

A common expression in the Army during the 70's & 80's.
A phrase used by equals to tell each other off, used by superiors to shut up subordinates.
A method of dismissing a stupid person.
The only possible use when you find yourself with a stick,
a funnel, some lube and a bag of sand.
A polite way to say fuck off.
Worker: "Hey boss, why don't we shut this job done and call
it a day, I'm tired."
Boss: " How can you be tired? You haven't done a damn thing all day. Maybe you should stay home tomorrow and pound sand up your ass!"
by jsd9632 January 8, 2012
mugGet the pound sand up your assmug.

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