hazletard-in-chief's definitions
The nickname for "The Berwick, Pennsylvania Jaycees' Christmas Boulevard" annual display. The display claims to be "over a mile of lights", meaning it utilizes upwards of a mile of strung lights, not that the display is actually a mile long. The display is located on the Market Street median directly in front of Berwick City Hall/The Jackson Mansion. It is actually quite popular in Northeastern Pennsylvania.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 5, 2010
Get the Berwick Lights mug.1. The signature sketch of prop comic Gallagher, in which he smashes miscellaneous items with a large mallet not an actual sledgehammer. Apparently, a sledgehammer is too heterosexual. 2. A potent strain of methamphetamine, named after the above prop comic. Originating from around Hazleton, Pennsylvania. Taken orally, intravenously, anally, vaginally, nasally and smoked. The original lab was raided at the dawn of 2010, but is back in operation.
1. douche bag: I brought the clear plastic tarp for Gallagher's show. Hope he brings the Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic. Hee hee hee.
2. hazletard: I need a quarter hit of some Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic, bad. So I can suck truck driver cock for enough cash for a full hit, no homo.
2. hazletard: I need a quarter hit of some Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic, bad. So I can suck truck driver cock for enough cash for a full hit, no homo.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Get the Gallagher Sledge-O-Matic mug.A necrophilia and coprophilia based sex act, in which a hazletard removes a corpse's head, defecates in the esophagus, and has sex with the esophagus.
hazletard: Nothing like visting the morgue at Hazleton General Hospital, and pulling off a Hazleton Hot Pocket!
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 10, 2010
Get the Hazleton Hot Pocket mug.The primary mode of transportation in Hazleton, PA, seen outside of every home: A stolen shopping cart!
hazletard 1: Got any WD-40, my ride needs a tune up.
hazletard 2: Ditch that bitch. I got this fly Hazletonmobile, from GIANT Food. No I can go Hazleton drifting, this afternoon.
hazletard 2: Ditch that bitch. I got this fly Hazletonmobile, from GIANT Food. No I can go Hazleton drifting, this afternoon.
by Hazletard-in-Chief December 11, 2010
Get the Hazletonmobile mug.1) noun: A mentally impaired person from Hazleton, Pennsylvania; 2) verb: to render something or somebody useless; 3) verb: to act mentally impaired while in the city limits of Hazleton, PA
A hazletard (definition 1) stole my quad, barrelled up City Hall's steps and hazletarded (def. 2 past-tense) the fucking bitch. The cops found him hazletarding (def. 3 past participle) down the block, from meth. I got to leave this fucking town!
by Hazletard-in-Chief October 11, 2010
Get the hazletard mug.Commonwealth of Pennsylvania: Can't we just abort Hazleton, PA 18201?
United States Supreme Court: No. Once you hit the third trimester, it's illegal. You are well over three hundred trimesters, already!
Commonwealth of Pennsylvania: FUCK!
United States Supreme Court: No. Once you hit the third trimester, it's illegal. You are well over three hundred trimesters, already!
Commonwealth of Pennsylvania: FUCK!
by Hazletard-in-Chief November 29, 2010
Get the Hazleton, PA 18201 mug.Spanish for New Dominican Republic. The Dominican nickname for Hazleton, Pennsylvania, due to it's evergrowing Dominican population.
white hazletard 1: I heard some spick, tell me to get my mullet out of his Nueva República Dominicana. Is that spanish for business?
white hazletard 2: Nope, that means move out of Hazleton, before you get your white ass mashed. I'm moving to Sugarloaf ASAP.
white hazletard 2: Nope, that means move out of Hazleton, before you get your white ass mashed. I'm moving to Sugarloaf ASAP.
by Hazletard-in-Chief November 27, 2010
Get the Nueva República Dominicana mug.