41 definitions by goose_on_a_roof

perts

Aesthetically the perfect breasts, not too big and can hold their own against gravity and blouse tug (derived from "pert and perky")

"Dude, I know ya love those knee-shootin’ yabos but there’s such a thing as too big. Now take that little amuse-bouche. That quasar has got a nice set of perts."

by goose_on_a_roof October 9, 2020

Gaseous Clay

a person with horrendously smelly farts (as he floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee. This is derived from “Cassius Clay” which is the birth name of the famed boxer Muhammad Ali.)

"SWEET MOTHER OF GOD!!! What is that smell? Whoa, you’re a regular Gaseous Clay. Alright, I throw in the towel. Now help me back on my feet, would ya?"

by goose_on_a_roof October 11, 2020

Chuck Norris of Cheap

one that has mastered the art of wallet fumbling, a stingy person or one that will pinch a penny until POTUS 1-6 is squealing like a little girl

I can be a little tight with a buck. Well, “little” may be somewhat misleading. Ok, ok, I've got my black belt in skinflint. I'm the miser master, the Chuck Norris of Cheap and in my spare time, I like to jam with my band, Penny Pinscher and the Tightwads. Seriously, I play a mean frugal horn.

by goose_on_a_roof October 19, 2020

tough crack to nut

an extremely attractive woman that no guy can score with

“Yeah, she’s as hot as a firecracker but you’d better forget it, pal. That’s a tough crack to nut.”

by goose_on_a_roof June 5, 2022

flatusidal tendencies

a disorder whereby a person has recurring thoughts about breaking wind in crowded and, often times, confined places (This is a dangerous situation in which the person in question is on the verge of becoming a sphincter Sinatra if he/she does not receive professional help or, at the very least, a bitch slap by his/her friends.)

Paratrooper: Sarge, I know it’s not the time but I keep thinking about plantin’ some onion.
Jumpmaster: GOT DAMN IT!!! Ya better at-ease those flatusidal tendencies or I’ll toss your goat-smellin’ ass off this bird right now, green light or not.

by goose_on_a_roof October 16, 2020

Amuse-Bouche

A cute little girl to w’et your…err, um… appetite (derived from the French term of the same name meaning: a small appetizer as served, usually without a charge, in a restaurant)

"Dude, I know ya love those knee-shootin’ yabos but there’s such a thing as too big. Now take that little amuse-bouche. That quasar has got a nice set of perts."

by goose_on_a_roof October 9, 2020

Going Paducah

dying, when someone or something is on it’s last legs, last gasp or exhibiting a death rattle (The word “Paducah” is derived from the sound made when a severed head is drop-kicked into an empty dumpster. pah-DOO-kah)

“C’mon stop smackin’ that old TV. You’re not helping any. It’s going Paducah and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

by goose_on_a_roof October 17, 2020