gnostic3's definitions

beating Armenia

v. A hollow, minor victory over a lesser power to make up for a drubbing by a superior power. Also a sexual euphemism in Canada.

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The Russian hockey team spanked us yesterday, but no worries:; tonight we’ll be beating Armenia.

by gnostic3 March 18, 2021

Nobel gesture

n. A refusal of a major cash prize or honour because of the horribly tainted origin of the award money.

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I hear Bob Dylan is going to refuse the Nobel Prize because Alfred Nobel made his fortune manufacturing high explosives.

Excellent. He is to be congratulated for making a Nobel gesture

by gnostic3 November 3, 2016

Ukelear Winter

n. Bleak post-apocalyptic future facing Northern Europe if madmen continue to pursue war.

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Feel that evil in the air? It is the approach of ukelear winter.

by gnostic3 February 28, 2022

offside trap

n. Defensive technique in soccer wherein the defenders closest to their own goal line all move simultaneously toward their opponents goal line just before an opponent boots the ball downfield. The object is to deliberately place any possible recipients of the pass in an offside position, and to allow soccer enthusiasts, who love to have their enjoyment interrupted by questions, the opportunity to again attempt to educate hockey fans on the nuances of the beautiful game.

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Why did the whistle blow? He was totally in the clear!

Offside trap. Again. Look, get me some crayons and I’ll try to explain it in simpler terms.

by gnostic3 July 5, 2019

poopocalypse

n. Catastrophic spillage of feces. Often involves splatters on walls and ceilings during diaper changes and results in liberal swearing, heavy drinking, vows of celibacy etc.

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Go to sleep Delano. Mommy is going to drink wine until she forgets your latest poopocalypse.

by gnostic3 March 7, 2015

dumpling

n. Small dump. Usually produced by a puppy or an overflowing politician.

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I wll grant you that it is cute. But it is none the less a dumpling. Avoid being sullied by it.

by gnostic3 May 30, 2020

druzzle

n. An amount of something such as rain, work, bleeding etc that makes life unpleasant or intolerable.

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Why so glum?

Having one of those days. Druzzle, druzzle , druzzle.

by gnostic3 August 29, 2022