I’m not a doctor

Preliminary sentence spoken by authority figure before any bizzare utterance to imply that any subsequent nonsensible ignorant ravings are just common sense irrespective of what the slaves to ‘Big Pharma’ keep saying.

..........

I’m not a doctor, but X-rays, they cause mutations right? So why not expose people full of covideo19 viruses to a bunch of X-rays? Maybe we could turn the viruses into herpes, or something else harmless that we all have?

by gnostic3 April 25, 2020

aussie rules

n. Only the best bleeding football game on the planet mate! Bunch of tall blokes elbowing each other in the spleens then hammering an inflated sheep’s bladder between a forest of upright posts or near enough to make no mind for either three points or nine. Also a straightforward set of laws designed to keep dangerous lunatics off God’s soil so they cannot imperil the grans.

..........................

I find your aussie rules is so confusing for me.

It’s only a bleeding tic box mate. Have you been away from home in the last fortnight, yes or no?

by gnostic3 January 12, 2022

messified

v. Raised to the level of the Gods.

..............................

The mayor thinks she has been messified. I beg to differ. She isn’t even a maradonair.

by gnostic3 December 19, 2022

walz

n. The emotional barriers that surround us and prevent enjoyable interactions.

...................

The walz! I feel the walz closing in!I need to break free from this prison that surrounds me!

Remonstrate much?

by gnostic3 March 16, 2021

golding

v. Bringing it hard to achieve victory.

...........................................

The Canadian hockey ladies are totally golding in the Beijing Olympics!

by gnostic3 February 21, 2022

cubbyhole

n. A situation in an important game where a team blows a lead and looks to be in danger of losing a chance to finally win a championship.

..........................

Dude! The X-Games gold was totally in your gnarly pouch and then you dug yourself into a cubbyhole.

Yeah, but I pulled myself, and pulled myself, and finally came first.

by gnostic3 November 04, 2016

firkytoodle

n. A canoodle, an affectionate kiss and cuddle.

....................

Darling, are you up for a firkytoodle after the cricket match? Could be ripping fun.

So, in four days unless it rains? Yeah, I guess I could pencil you in.

by gnostic3 March 05, 2020