Yopmail User's definitions

facebook

The act of placing tracking chips on a small child's ankle and in his eye sockets before forcing him to drink ten gallons of a mixture of your saliva, spit, cum, vomit, snot, piss, and sweat, among other bodily fluids; others can be used if necessary. Once you have that down, ram your cock up his ass (and vagina if female) as hard as possible before skullfucking him in his nostrils and ears. After you finish that, gaze at his naked body while throwing condoms at him for half an hour before tearing off one of his limbs, using it as a fleshlight, and making him take a bite out of it. You will then need to knock him unconscious and rape him repeatedly in most of his bodily crevices. Once the act is done, bring him home as if nothing happened, stalk him extensively, and take pictures of his body while he's sleeping. Get some Diet Coke and Mentos and hold it against the stub where his severed limb used to be.

Facebook harvests your personal info so they can perform this sex act.

by Yopmail User November 26, 2023

The Emoji Movie

If you, by some miracle, are actually thinking of watching this school shooting of a "movie," please dial the Suicide Hotline: [phone]. Watching it is, to say the least, an incredibly painful way to fucking die. And to those of you who have watched it, I wish you'd known how much you'd be missed before then.

The Emoji Movie makes the Holocaust look fucking hilarious.

by Yopmail User April 10, 2023

Imgflip

Twitter for retarded tweens. This shitty meme site for faggots is plagued its extremely toxic community that acts like the entitled fucks they are over the most retarded reasons. A huge chunk of the userbase, mostly consisting of said faggots, gang rapes their brethren as soon as they post anything pertaining to upvotes. These faggots are the ones posting shitty "memes" that can and will give you Ebola and AIDS. There are a handful of normal, sensible people there, but that doesn't say much.

The clusterfuck of a faggotcopter we like to call Imgflip can go fuck itself to Hell and back.

by Yopmail User April 10, 2023

Fridge

To put on a condom, freeze your dick in a fridge, and anally and vaginally penetrate your girlfriend with the frozen condom on. To spice things up a bit, put some crushed ghost pepper in the condom and attempt to break the icy condom as you penetrate her.

I nearly rendered the both of us sterile after I spicily fridged my girlfriend.

by Yopmail User April 10, 2023

Rubik's Cube

To pour six cans of paint on your head (each of them representing colors on an actual Rubik's Cube), which you penetrate your girlfriend's ass and vagina with (either order is fine) while ramming it as far up as possible and violently nodding during both processes for maximum pleasure. Consent is not required.

That kid's vagina smelled great during that Rubik's Cube. Her ass was not so beautiful.

by Yopmail User April 11, 2023

Richard Nixon

This is when two or more males engage in mutual masturbation, then dock each other just before they ejaculate. The docking must last as long as it takes for the cum to harden on both of their dicks. After that, they must attempt to separate the heads of their dicks in the most painful ways possible.

I used to be a pariah like you until I Richard Nixoned 78 thirteen-year-old boys.

by Yopmail User April 12, 2023

Avatar: The Way of Water

-This shit happens more than ten years after the fucking prequel.
-Humans invade Pandora.
-The dead guy named Miles Quaritch turns out to be blue and alive.

-Jake's kids get kidnapped and freed (Spider being an exception).
-Jake and his family move to the fucking ocean.
-Lo'ak (Jake's son) fights some dude and almost gets fucking eaten by a predator.
-A tulkun named Payakan saves him (he's ostracized because he fought with the dudes who killed his mother).
-Kiri has a seizure. She lives because muh plot armor.
-Quaritch massacres the fucking tulkuns. Their brains prevent aging.
-Jake and his family get trapped in a sunken vessel (Payakan attacks it and kills the crew earlier).
-Lo'ak, Tsireya (Metkayina princess), and Tuk (Jack's daughter) get captured and live.
-Neteyam (Jake's son) dies. The other kids live.
-Quaritch holds Kiri (Jake's daughter) hostage until Neytiri (Jake's wife) cuts Spider's chest with a knife.
-Spider saves Quaritch and fucking stays on Pandora.
-Jake and his family stay underwater.

Avatar: The Way of Water sucks ass. Read these spoilers instead.

by Yopmail User December 18, 2022