58 definitions by The Real Canadian
Pioneering, but forgotten, 1950’s and 1960’s shock jock Joe Pyne called cigarettes this, being resigned to his chain smoking habit. (He died of lung cancer in 1970, aged 45). These days, coffin nails could mean three things:
1. Long, squared off manicures in the shape of an old school coffin;
2. French fries because they’re unhealthy to begin with; and
3. Cigarettes.
1. Long, squared off manicures in the shape of an old school coffin;
2. French fries because they’re unhealthy to begin with; and
3. Cigarettes.
How could Miranda type with those ugly coffin nails in her way?
No wonder why Albert is so fat, he eats that big carton of coffin nails with chili and cheese every day for lunch.
The Surgeon General has determined that smoking coffin nails is dangerous to your health.
No wonder why Albert is so fat, he eats that big carton of coffin nails with chili and cheese every day for lunch.
The Surgeon General has determined that smoking coffin nails is dangerous to your health.
by The Real Canadian September 24, 2020
Donald Trump could drink regular Coke and still be an asswipe.
I wouldn’t let my teen daughter go out with that asswipe, Matt Gaetz.
I wouldn’t let my teen daughter go out with that asswipe, Matt Gaetz.
by The Real Canadian April 14, 2021
A grotesque, smelly carcass that lies on a seashore. Whether that fish died after eating our crap or from natural causes, its very sight is enough to make us lose our lunch. Don't. Swim. Here.
After that big rainstorm last night our beach was littered with dead fish. They had their last supper of raw sewage and God knows what else, but I'll never drink the water again.
by The Real Canadian July 18, 2015
1. Title of a schlocky 1970s syndicated series starring Chuck Barris and featuring the dubious talents of Gene Gene The Dancing Machine, The Unknown Comic and many others.
2. A group of stupid, incompetent and/or crooked people, doing stuff that would get them fired from most other places.
3. A situation where anything that could go wrong does.
2. A group of stupid, incompetent and/or crooked people, doing stuff that would get them fired from most other places.
3. A situation where anything that could go wrong does.
The Gong Show turned your brains into mush in a half hour.
The whole fucking place is a gong show, nobody knows what they are doing.
The party last night was one big gong show. The DJ played The Carpenters, we had nothing but stale Cheetos and warm beer, and we watched Gigli on TV. We should have stayed home!
The whole fucking place is a gong show, nobody knows what they are doing.
The party last night was one big gong show. The DJ played The Carpenters, we had nothing but stale Cheetos and warm beer, and we watched Gigli on TV. We should have stayed home!
by The Real Canadian July 10, 2021
Donald Trump may have been out of office for close to a month, but those whackadoodle MAGAts think he’ll get inaugurated on March 6. He. Lost. The. Election. Get it?
by The Real Canadian February 11, 2021
Canada’s favorite donut shop, Timmy’s is a colloquialism for Tim Hortons (originally Tim Horton Donuts). Founded in 1964 by Toronto Maple Leafs player Tim Horton; he was killed on his way back to Toronto from a game with the Buffalo Sabres a decade later, but his spirit lives on.
It seems like everybody at work avoids our coffee in the break room, running to Timmy’s across the street instead.
by The Real Canadian July 12, 2022
An ultra-low fare passenger air carrier ie, Spirit or Swoop, it offers such no frills amenities as all-economy seats. They may or may not offer wi-fi, and if you get hungry or thirsty then you have to buy your overpriced chips and soda.
McAirlines are like McDonald’s, offering cheap stuff that serve their purpose to the widest customer base.
McAirlines are like McDonald’s, offering cheap stuff that serve their purpose to the widest customer base.
I flew with a McAirline from Toronto to Calgary early this morning. The seats were cramped together and I had to pay for my chips and Diet Coke, but I arrived in one piece. That’s good enough for me.
by The Real Canadian April 28, 2023