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Tenacious Faulker's definitions

meet and greet

Business jargon for a function before a professional meeting, seminar, convention or conference where you go to meet people in your field to network and get laid.
The National Protological Association annuall convention's meet and greet was a success. I met with the heads of 5 manufactures, 4 resellers, 2 financiers, and 3 cocktail waitresses.
by Tenacious Faulker July 11, 2009
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keep it on the up

1) Doing what society expects of you; being a proper ciizen; acting properly. Using socially acceptable behavior. Another way to say "walk the straight and narrow path"; being a "proper"citizen; straight laced.

2) The alternate name for "Troublemaker", by Weezer, by dumbasses because they only really listen to the chorus.
"Troublemaker" Exerpt, 2nd verse:

I'm growin' out my hair,

I'm movin' up to Cherokee,

I'm gonna be a rockstar,

And you will go ta bed with me,

'Cause I can't work a job,

Like any other slob,

Punchin' in and punchin' out
and suckin-up to "Bob".

Marryin' a bi-otch,

Havin' seven ki-ods,

Givin' up and growin' old,

And hopin' there's a God.

I'm a troublemaker,

Never been a faker.

Doin' things my own way

And never givin' up

I'm a troublemaker,

Not a doubletaker.

I don't have the patience to keep it on the up.
by Tenacious Faulker June 25, 2009
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Romnesia

A condition of convenient memory loss that affects political candidates at election time. This is an chronic condition stemming from being an incurable asshole or insufferable idiot but one can still seek treatment since ObamaCare covers pre-existing conditions such as this.
Warning from the Surgeon General:

Romnesia is an unfortunate, chronic condition affecting 9 out of 10 politicians during election campaigns

Symptoms are: forgetting one's original political stances, pandering, short-term memory loss, long-term memory loss, voter confusion, flip-flopping, plagerizing others' ideas and speaking in Palin-dromes. Symptoms maybe be exacerbated when addressing crowds, during televised interviews or debating.
by Tenacious Faulker October 26, 2012
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Beaming Schatner off the Enterprise

Yet another colorful coloquialism for taking a dump: "Beaming" for the act of evacuation, "Schatner" as in the past tense of To shit (shat), and "off the Enterprise" denoting out of the anus (as in "the prize to be entered").

Not to be confused with Beaming Dr. Bones onto the Enterprise; the act of anal sex.
Man! Your mom's cooking is so bad it had me beaming Schatner off the Enterprise all night!
by Tenacious Faulker October 16, 2008
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brain drain

When an organization or community is doing poorly enough that its smartest people, seeing the writing on the wall, leave for better opportunities elsewhere. This is common in business and other organizations that perpetuate a common goal or mission and once purged it typically accelerates the demise of the organiztion.

For example: Facebook's poor stock performance since it's IPO and lack of favorable stock options for employees puts them at risk of brain drain. Many will likely head over to Google or Apple, but they'll be in trouble.
Mark Zuckerberg: Sheryl, can find me those repots on Zynga's...Hey?! Why are wearing a Google sweatshirt?!

Sheryl Sandberg: Sorry Mark. We had a good run, but your lack of focus on ad revenue and overvalued IPO has caused this drop in FB stock value with no end in sight. I and the others are leaving before the stock tanks.

Mark Z: The others? They're all leaving Facebook? You can't! We'll never survive this brain drain!

Sheryl: Yeah, sorry. You should've thought about that before going public.
by Tenacious Faulker August 21, 2012
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eyeball test

To scan over something or someone quickly; to measure without using any tools other than the naked eye; guessing; approximating. A term often used in sports scouting to see if a player or team passes muster without looking at any metrics.
We passed on that short receiver because he didn't pass the ball test.

I know that actress just walked in off the street, but but she passes my eyeball test. Get her signed and to the studio pronto!

I left a blind date before I even sat down. She didn't pass my eyeball test.

That presentation needs to be reformatted to read better. Its simply doesn't pass an eyeball test.
by Tenacious Faulker March 5, 2014
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God's Vagina

A term popularized in the 2008 comedy "Pineapple Express" to describe the best marajuana presumeably because of its dank odor and potency. The term can also be used to describe other things that are considered to be the best by an individual.
Dude, smell that weed. Ya like that? It's like smelling God's Vagina!

Do you like these satin sheets? Yeah? It's like being wrapped inside God's Vagina!

Hey, did you you like making love to God's Vagina? OMG, it's like FUCKING God's Vagina!
by Tenacious Faulker August 24, 2009
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