Tenacious Faulker's definitions

turkey coma

The inevitable and unavoidable nap that occurs about 45 minutes after gorging one's self on a Thanksgiving Day turkey feast and 15 minutes into a traditional, holiday football game. The cause of this an amino acid called L-Tryptophan which turkey meat has in abundance.

Where's Daddy? I haven't seen him since Thanksgiving dinner.

He inhaled two full plates of roast turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, corn and yams smothered in gravy then sat down by the fireplace to watch the Packers-Lions. The poor bastard fought like hell, but could only make it to the 2nd quarter before succumbing to a full-blown turkey coma.

by Tenacious Faulker December 1, 2009

face off

(v.) A hockey metaphor meaning to compete; to face an adverary; to confront.

Ugh! My performance review is today and I have to face off with my boss!

by Tenacious Faulker April 5, 2009

Vente

A word that reportedly means "20" in Italian, but at Starbucks it simply means extra-large.

I hate going into a Starbuck's for coffee. The dumbass baristas always treat me like an idiot because I confuse a "Tall, "Grande" and "Vente". "Short" is the only size that makes sense and "Grande" is a Spanish word! WTF is that?! Why can't they just call them medium, large and extra large?

by Tenacious Faulker May 18, 2009

Ex-lax

noun. A name for a person who fouls something up; a fuck up, a schelmiel.

Hey! Smooth move, Ex-lax!

by Tenacious Faulker April 16, 2009

legendary

Intensifier added to any word to take it's meaning to its highest power imaginable.

Win: Legendary win

Fail: Legendary fail

Kill: Legendary kill

Awesomeness: Legendary awesomeness

The Dude: The Legendary Dude

Dog's balls: Legendary Dog's balls

Weed: Legendary weed

pwned: Legendary pwned

Sex: Lengendary sex

Get it?

by Tenacious Faulker April 1, 2009

Beaming Schatner off the Enterprise

Yet another colorful coloquialism for taking a dump: "Beaming" for the act of evacuation, "Schatner" as in the past tense of To shit (shat), and "off the Enterprise" denoting out of the anus (as in "the prize to be entered").

Not to be confused with Beaming Dr. Bones onto the Enterprise; the act of anal sex.

Man! Your mom's cooking is so bad it had me beaming Schatner off the Enterprise all night!

by Tenacious Faulker October 16, 2008

brain drain

When an organization or community is doing poorly enough that its smartest people, seeing the writing on the wall, leave for better opportunities elsewhere. This is common in business and other organizations that perpetuate a common goal or mission and once purged it typically accelerates the demise of the organiztion.

For example: Facebook's poor stock performance since it's IPO and lack of favorable stock options for employees puts them at risk of brain drain. Many will likely head over to Google or Apple, but they'll be in trouble.

Mark Zuckerberg: Sheryl, can find me those repots on Zynga's...Hey?! Why are wearing a Google sweatshirt?!

Sheryl Sandberg: Sorry Mark. We had a good run, but your lack of focus on ad revenue and overvalued IPO has caused this drop in FB stock value with no end in sight. I and the others are leaving before the stock tanks.

Mark Z: The others? They're all leaving Facebook? You can't! We'll never survive this brain drain!

Sheryl: Yeah, sorry. You should've thought about that before going public.

by Tenacious Faulker August 21, 2012