1: To put money in a bank.
2: To rely on something or someone. (eg: I was banking on this happening).
3: A building where they charge you a fortune for the least little thing (eg: £30 to tell you you're overdrawn). I went in one bank for an international money order. The women who dealt with them (no-one else was allowed the keys to the desk with the IMOs in) had gone to lunch, wouldn't be back for another fifteen minutes. So, after a lot of hanging around the town centre, I went back to the bank only to find they didn't have any remaining IMOs. Given that IMOs are pieces of paper with printed writing on them which the bank sell for £8 each, I'm sure it can't be a case of them not being able to afford more with the profits they make (given that they also employ as few people as possible to keep their profits up). They'll have some more IMOs 'soon'. Whether that means tomorrow, next week, next month or next year I don't know. But you'd think they'd order more IMOs when they're running low on them, not wait until after they've run out.
2: To rely on something or someone. (eg: I was banking on this happening).
3: A building where they charge you a fortune for the least little thing (eg: £30 to tell you you're overdrawn). I went in one bank for an international money order. The women who dealt with them (no-one else was allowed the keys to the desk with the IMOs in) had gone to lunch, wouldn't be back for another fifteen minutes. So, after a lot of hanging around the town centre, I went back to the bank only to find they didn't have any remaining IMOs. Given that IMOs are pieces of paper with printed writing on them which the bank sell for £8 each, I'm sure it can't be a case of them not being able to afford more with the profits they make (given that they also employ as few people as possible to keep their profits up). They'll have some more IMOs 'soon'. Whether that means tomorrow, next week, next month or next year I don't know. But you'd think they'd order more IMOs when they're running low on them, not wait until after they've run out.
by Stormsworder November 16, 2006
Get the bank mug.A way of making the government yet more money, cynically disguised as a way of stopping accidents. As with most of this government's ways of conning the public, anyone with an IQ of over 15 can work out it's just a con. Often speeding signs are not clearly visible (my mother was caught out like this), and in Luton a couple of years ago there were ten (!) police officers standing on a roadside stopping cars at random in the hope that one of the drivers might not have insurance or an up-to-date tax disc. Given the crime rate in Luton, is anyone out there seriously going to tell me they had nothing better to do? But back to the point. I'm not in favour of speeding (I saw a lunatic using a housing estate as a race track), but 5% of accidents are due to speeding. Speed cameras can't stop people driving like they're on the dodgems. And now people are having to keep a constant eye on their speed-o-meters, thus are distracted from the road ahead. Nice one, New Labour.
In court this morning a man was fined £200 and 18 months loss of license after being caught speeding by one of the speed cameras. In the next court-room a man was let off with a warning for GBH.
by Stormsworder October 17, 2006
Get the speed cameras mug.One of evolution's greatest success stories. There are spiders all over the world, and the oldest known fossil spider is 380 million years old. Spiders are eight-legged and carnivorous, use silk in a variety of ways depending on the species. Many spin cobwebs to catch prey, larger spiders line the edge of their burrows with web. The bolas spider is named because it throws a line of web ending in a sticky lump to catch prey. Spiders inspire fear and revulsion, quite undeserved, but probably not helped by years of movies telling us spiders are humanity's enemies. Schools are not much more helpful. I still remember a science teacher telling us a black widow was the size of a human hand, which is rubbish. There are some dangerously venomous spiders, like widow spiders, funnelweb spiders, brown recluse spiders and brazilian wandering spiders, but they are a tiny minority of the huge number of spiders in the world. Just to drag some widely-held beliefs into the light of reality:
1: Spiders are not watching you. Most, apart from some jumping spiders, have very poor eyesight.
2: Spiders do not come out of plug-holes. A spider in the bath has fallen down there and can't get out due to the bath's slippery sides.
3: Large hairy spiders are not automatically dangerous. In fact nobody has ever died from a tarantula bite.
4: Women are not automatically scared of spiders. In fact most of the calls the British Tarantula Society gets regarding fear of spiders are from worried men.
1: Spiders are not watching you. Most, apart from some jumping spiders, have very poor eyesight.
2: Spiders do not come out of plug-holes. A spider in the bath has fallen down there and can't get out due to the bath's slippery sides.
3: Large hairy spiders are not automatically dangerous. In fact nobody has ever died from a tarantula bite.
4: Women are not automatically scared of spiders. In fact most of the calls the British Tarantula Society gets regarding fear of spiders are from worried men.
Hysterical person: Help! I saw a spider! I'm not going to bed! It might be there waiting for me!
Other person: What makes you think any self-respecting spiders would want to get into your bed?
Other person: What makes you think any self-respecting spiders would want to get into your bed?
by StormSworder August 15, 2006
Get the spider mug.A threat to road safety, these kinds of so-called drivers spend their time wolf-whistling at women, making stupid gestures with their hands at passers-by and generally carrying on as though they're on the dodgems. They can be found in vans of any colour, or other vehicles such as lorries, but the white van seems to have become traditional with people whose IQs are lower than their shoe size. They are often fat and reckon they're well'ard and'll give yer a slap, yer know wot I mean, mate?
A short guide to white van man hand signals.
Middle finger = "This is the number of my IQ"
Hand-cranking gesture = "This is what I do often because I can't pull a bird on account of too many of them having a brain".
Honking their horn = "I'm a complete inadequate and my vehicle's an altermnative to a dick".
Middle finger = "This is the number of my IQ"
Hand-cranking gesture = "This is what I do often because I can't pull a bird on account of too many of them having a brain".
Honking their horn = "I'm a complete inadequate and my vehicle's an altermnative to a dick".
by Stormsworder January 06, 2007
Get the white van man mug.1: A name associated with Russia for some reason or another.
2: A name sometimes given to tarantulas. Probably comes from the song 'Boris the Spider'.
2: A name sometimes given to tarantulas. Probably comes from the song 'Boris the Spider'.
"Don't call that spider Hairy. His name is Boris".
"It is? Does he come to you when you call his name?"
"It is? Does he come to you when you call his name?"
by Stormsworder February 04, 2007
Get the boris mug.1: A package used to keep things or delivery things through the post in.
2: A way of fighting using the fists. Professional boxing involves two people trying to be the first to knock the other out for a count of ten.
3: A female genetalia. Other slang for female genetalia include halibut, front bottom, pussy, twat, cunt.
2: A way of fighting using the fists. Professional boxing involves two people trying to be the first to knock the other out for a count of ten.
3: A female genetalia. Other slang for female genetalia include halibut, front bottom, pussy, twat, cunt.
by Stormsworder April 03, 2007
Get the box mug.The most impressive-looking of one of my favourite group of dinosaurs. This animal was about the size of an elephant, had a parrot-like beak, a long horn on its nose and a bony frill around the top of its neck with six long spikes. Has appeared in films such as Son of Kong, Valley of Gwangi and Land That Time Forgot, but sadly not in any of the Jurassic Park films.
That Styracosaurus might have kicked Gwangi's rear end if that stupid cowboy hadn't stabbed it. If you're near a flesh-eating carnivore fighting a relatively harmless plant-eater, why on earth would you try to kill the plant-eater?
by StormSworder August 11, 2006
Get the styracosaurus mug.