Stormsworder's definitions
A soap opera which used to be unmissable entertainment, but since about 2001 it has completely lost the plot. All the interesting characters have gone, replaced by people who are either irritating, obnoxious or both. I've lived where there are a lot of real eastenders and they're nothing like the ones in this soap opera. Albert Square is now populated by patronising working-class stereotypes (who are usually criminals, wife-beaters, serial killers etc). Nobody can keep their trousers/skirt on for more than five minutes, and Dirty Den suddenly rising from the grave shows how desperate the series has become, having exhausted all possible storylines years ago. Only continues because soap operas are so cheap to make. Once you've built the sets, you can use them forever, and you only need to go on location for a week twice a year and have a special effect once in a blue moon. And you can use the same storylines over and over. Eastenders always has an extra-depressing storyline at Christmas. Ho-ho-ho to you as well. By the way, Eastenders is now on four times a week, so that's even more padding to enjoy.
To hell with decent plots and characters. What we want in eastenders are headline-grabbing gimmick storylines, no matter how ridiculous they are. Lol! Eastenders was always larger-than-life, but surely there must be some limits.
by Stormsworder January 6, 2007
Get the eastendersmug. A seat-shaped object leading to a pipe which, in turn, leads to the sewers. Used to dispose of bodily waste - though urine is often disposed of on the floor around the base of the toilet. A toilet is a source of much hilarity with schoolboys or those with similar ideas about humour (like me, for example). Also used in insults (eg: "you smell like a public toilet"). A toilet is a place the Queen never has to visit (through some miracle of biology, presumably). People who are sick in the toilet are said to be "talking down the big white telephone". Although some toilets I've seen are so filthy their original colour is long lost in the mists of time.
In my old school someone took something out of a toilet and smeared it across a classroom wall. The teacher was adamant that the culprit would be made to clean it off. The guilty party was never revealed, so the shat stayed on the wall and festered for years after. This was a classroom used as a lunch-hall. What a charming school.
by Stormsworder May 31, 2007
Get the toiletmug. 1: A name associated with Russia for some reason or another.
2: A name sometimes given to tarantulas. Probably comes from the song 'Boris the Spider'.
2: A name sometimes given to tarantulas. Probably comes from the song 'Boris the Spider'.
"Don't call that spider Hairy. His name is Boris".
"It is? Does he come to you when you call his name?"
"It is? Does he come to you when you call his name?"
by Stormsworder February 4, 2007
Get the borismug. The white elephant of the Sony Playstation series. Despite the fact there were riots in the streets as fans fought over it, the console is quite the most over-priced, ugly thing in video-gaming history. The control pads are wireless (I once bought wireless control pads for a console and they were a nightmare to use). They will cost gamers a fortune in batteries. Sony have already, rather unwisely, announced the PS4, the PS3 is not compatible with PS2 or PS1 games, and the PS3's game line-up is frankly pathetic.
According to Sony, the PS3 will have "4D graphics". Meaning they can travel through time? The PS3 can also fly you to any planet of your choice, cure all known diseases, work out how humanity can exist without wars, famine or suffering and ensure peace and love reign forever.
by Stormsworder October 16, 2007
Get the ps3mug. The white elephant of the Sony Playstation series. Despite the fact there were riots in the streets as fans fought over it, the console is quite the most over-priced, ugly thing in video-gaming history. The control pads are wireless (I once bought wireless control pads for a console and they were a nightmare to use). They will cost gamers a fortune in batteries. Sony have already, rather unwisely, announced the PS4, the PS3 is not compatible with PS2 or PS1 games, and the PS3's game line-up is frankly pathetic.
According to Sony, the PS3 will have "4D graphics". Meaning they can travel through time? The PS3 can also fly you to any planet of your choice, cure all known diseases, work out how humanity can exist without wars, famine or suffering and ensure peace and love reign forever.
by Stormsworder October 30, 2007
Get the ps3mug. An android from the sci-fi/comedy series Red Dwarf, Kryten looks like a human wearing metallic clothes, but has a cube-like, geometric head. He became a regular in Series 3, played by Robert Llewellyn, but was actually first seen in an episode of Series 2 in which the Red Dwarf crew find him on a crashed spacecraft. He has been programmed to look after the crew of the marooned craft, but didn't realise they had been dead for many years. Played by Dave Ross, his original character was based on the butler in 'The Admirable Crichton'. Taken back to Red Dwarf, he was persuaded to rebel against Rimmer's task-master treatment and went joy-riding on Lister's space bike. In the Series 3 prologue (freeze-frame the tape/DVD to read it) it was revealed he had crashed, and that Lister had put him back together but had been unable to restore his original personality. Since then Lister has fought a losing battle trying to encourage Kryten to break his programming (by developing emotions, being able to lie etc). It has been revealed that Kryten can change heads, can detach his hand and send it to bring help, and can remove his eyes (useful for when communicating with human-hating psychotic androids).
by Stormsworder October 18, 2006
Get the krytenmug. Someone who, at school, is too lazy to work and sees no reason why any one else should. Despite their parading about, bullies are physical cowards who will only pick on those weaker than themselves. They usually finish up in and out of jail or serving behind the fish counter until they're 70. Bullies can also be found in the work-place, or hanging around streets and pubs looking for trouble. Grown-up bullies are basically schoolboys who've never grown up, usually because they can't deal with the adult world. Many bullies are short-arses with an inferiority complex which means they have to try to prove themselves. They are usually dated by sleazy blondes with an IQ of 4 between them. Teachers can also be bullies, which means that bullying problems among the school-children don't go away as the bullying teachers pick on the weaker boys.
That pair of bullies have just pushed someone onto the ground and repeatedly kicked him in the face and head. They then ran away before he could get up. What big brave men they are. I want them to arse-bandit me. All worship the bully.
by Stormsworder April 8, 2007
Get the bullymug.