The act of nutting on a girl’s tits and then motorboating them immediately after. When the man’s lips meet the woman’s breasts, the resulting sound will be that of a harmonica as the man simultaneously gags on his own beat juice.
Tyrant: Dude I was playing my guitar and harmonica last night. I love jamming, it’s my passion.
The Boss: Bro I was jamming too. I performed a Gagging Harmonica last night. I splooged on my wife’s tits and then proceeded to play “Piano Man” by Billy Joel. I made it about a minute before I started gagging on my Spunk.
Tyrant: Bro we should perform a duet. I love piano man!
The Boss: Bro I was jamming too. I performed a Gagging Harmonica last night. I splooged on my wife’s tits and then proceeded to play “Piano Man” by Billy Joel. I made it about a minute before I started gagging on my Spunk.
Tyrant: Bro we should perform a duet. I love piano man!
by Stoney69 April 18, 2019
When you are done making poopoo and you are ready to wipe your butthole, you stand up to wipe. Once done, you go to toss the TP in the toilet but accidentally miss. The poopy filled TP hits the victim’s foot in the stall next to you and you must make a crunch time decision to book it out of the bathroom or wait for them to leave before you. The key is not to get caught, or you will be in for some intense embarrassment, and maybe even lifetime if it is a coworker. (**Disclaimer: Inspired by true Events**)
Grappler: Dude, some shit just happened to me.
Big Easy: Go ahead...
Grappler: I was droppin a deuce staley, and I went for a Cornhole TP toss into the shitpot. My aim was off and it hit the side of the shitpot and bounced into the stall next to me. Unfortunately it landed right on the buhl’s foot next to me and it was covered in the brown. I didn’t even finish wiping or bother to flush, I legit booked it out of there and carried on with the day.
Big Easy: Donkey Boner
Big Easy: Go ahead...
Grappler: I was droppin a deuce staley, and I went for a Cornhole TP toss into the shitpot. My aim was off and it hit the side of the shitpot and bounced into the stall next to me. Unfortunately it landed right on the buhl’s foot next to me and it was covered in the brown. I didn’t even finish wiping or bother to flush, I legit booked it out of there and carried on with the day.
Big Easy: Donkey Boner
by Stoney69 November 29, 2019
When a prostitute fiddles with your prostate until you toot, and then you shun her for the rest of the STD bang sesh.
Big Queefy: Yo Boner, I’m tryna hit hooters tonight, you in?
Boney Stoney: First, it’s Boney, not Boner. And second, I’m out. I’m shunning prostitutes rn, I call it prostate-toot-shun. So I’m not down with looking at any Hooter whores tonight. You’ll get multiple STDs just looking at them.
Big Queefy: True, I got Gonorrhea and Crabs just from staring at this Hooter hoe last time. Turns out the crabs were not the food like I thought..
Boney Stoney: Damn that’s hot. Nvm, I’m so in.
Boney Stoney: First, it’s Boney, not Boner. And second, I’m out. I’m shunning prostitutes rn, I call it prostate-toot-shun. So I’m not down with looking at any Hooter whores tonight. You’ll get multiple STDs just looking at them.
Big Queefy: True, I got Gonorrhea and Crabs just from staring at this Hooter hoe last time. Turns out the crabs were not the food like I thought..
Boney Stoney: Damn that’s hot. Nvm, I’m so in.
by Stoney69 July 17, 2022
This occurs when your gonads are hung like a horse and you’re sittin’ on the shit pot. When you flush, the boys get caught in the suction and are ripped from your scrotal sack and flushed into oblivion.
Tyrant: Dude you wanna hit the strip club tonight? I heard Rosie O’ Donnell is gonna be there showing off her FUPA. You could fit a fucking Boeing 737 in that puss.
Big Easy: I’m gonna have to sit this one out my dawg. Just experienced bollock butchery last night. I was going to Dunkin, and next thing I know my cojones get sucked down the shit pipe. Hoping to get a transplant in the next week. I may take one from Phil Collins. There’s a myth going around on the internet that he’s had a third nut all these years. Must be why he’s always coming in the air.
Tyrant: Dude you got serious fucking issues.
Big Easy: I’m gonna have to sit this one out my dawg. Just experienced bollock butchery last night. I was going to Dunkin, and next thing I know my cojones get sucked down the shit pipe. Hoping to get a transplant in the next week. I may take one from Phil Collins. There’s a myth going around on the internet that he’s had a third nut all these years. Must be why he’s always coming in the air.
Tyrant: Dude you got serious fucking issues.
by Stoney69 August 01, 2019
This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
by Stoney69 December 18, 2020
Here’s the situation. You have this chick over and you about to eat some flounder. As she becomes moist, you then realize she has SOS (Stanky Oozing Syndrome). You can either tell her your stomach hurts and fish will just irritate it, or you can man up and say you gotta drop a massive dookster and will be right back. You proceed to go to the bathroom and eat a dead bat that you’ve been storing for a situation like this. You will instantly contract COVID-19 and lose all smell and taste. Now get back out there and enjoy a nice filet-o-fish.
T-Bone: Yo broski, what’s on the menu tonight?
Big Queasy: Well I was gonna eat some salmon with my wife, but the fish I been having lately just don’t taste right..
T-Bone: Hmmm.. sounds like a case of SOS (Stanky Oozing Syndrome). I’ll tell you what if you need any dead bats, just go to Shitty Noodle Factory. My boy Ching Ming Wang can hook you up with some fresh COVID-19 in no time. Then that “salmon” will just taste like nothing.
Big Queasy: Thanks T-Bone. I knew there was a reason we were friends. I will hit up the SNF for dinner tonight. I hear they have great dinner specials.
Big Queasy: Well I was gonna eat some salmon with my wife, but the fish I been having lately just don’t taste right..
T-Bone: Hmmm.. sounds like a case of SOS (Stanky Oozing Syndrome). I’ll tell you what if you need any dead bats, just go to Shitty Noodle Factory. My boy Ching Ming Wang can hook you up with some fresh COVID-19 in no time. Then that “salmon” will just taste like nothing.
Big Queasy: Thanks T-Bone. I knew there was a reason we were friends. I will hit up the SNF for dinner tonight. I hear they have great dinner specials.
by Stoney69 April 23, 2021
So you’re having a bad day. What better way to improve the day than to play a joke on someone and make them miserable too? This gag starts by dropping a steamy snickers along with a cream pie in the punch bowl and then dropping an object of importance right next to the toilet. You must now come up with an excuse to make someone else retrieve the item (eg: I threw out my back last night bc Bill Cosby pounded my spinky so good. Could you please help me?). If timed correctly, when the poor lad goes to pick up the item, the toilet will auto flush and the creamy mudpie will splatter onto his face like a child trying to eat a cream filled donut.
Tyrant: Dude I took the kids swimming yesterday. It was a nice day.
Big Easy: Glad you had a nice day, my day was miserable. I went to the shitter and decided to pump and dump. Then told buhl I needed him to pick something up for me. When he went to bend over the toilet flushed at the perfect time and he got mollywhopped by my Boston cream pie. You know what they say, “misery loves cumpoony”.
Tyrant: You need to see a psychiatrist.
Big Easy: Glad you had a nice day, my day was miserable. I went to the shitter and decided to pump and dump. Then told buhl I needed him to pick something up for me. When he went to bend over the toilet flushed at the perfect time and he got mollywhopped by my Boston cream pie. You know what they say, “misery loves cumpoony”.
Tyrant: You need to see a psychiatrist.
by Stoney69 August 30, 2019