SkidMarkyMark's definitions

fruit salad

n. An item rumored to exist at certain parties, consisting of a bowl filled with random pills. Partygoers dip into the bowl and experience random effects.

Back in the '80s--the "Just Say No" era--in elementary school health class, they warned us of the dangers of fruit salad. Of course, such a thing has never existed, but the important thing was to scare us away from drugs.

by SkidMarkyMark August 2, 2006

dragon wagon

n. A car--generally either a hybrid, a 15-year-old station wagon, or a rustbucket Geo--that features this bumper sticker on the rear:

"Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."

It's actually legal to run this car off the road, pull the driver out, and beat them to death.

I saw a dragon wagon on the freeway the other day, so I killed the occupant, who was one of those annoying SCA types, before he could breed.

by SkidMarkyMark February 1, 2007

kentucky doorbell

To drive up to someone's house or apartment and proceed to honk the horn until they come out, rather than going to all the trouble of exiting the vehicle and going to the door.

Cletus across the street had a friend that would ring the Kentucky doorbell each morning at 5:00 am. I say "had" because me and my tire iron had a little chat with him.

by SkidMarkyMark May 28, 2006

jackpack

n. The bag in which Jack Bauer carries his gun, PDA, ammo, cell phone, duct tape, knife, scope, etc. It is NOT a man purse.

The terrorists thought they had Bauer at last, but he pulled a bazooka out of his jackpack.

by SkidMarkyMark May 12, 2006

wedding ring

n. A magical artifact that provides the wearer protection from receiving oral sex.

It's not just a wedding ring, it's a +5 Ring of Protection against oral sex.

by SkidMarkyMark May 28, 2006

johnny marzetti

n. A casserole composed of low-grade ground beef, onions, crushed tomatoes, tomato sauce, and pasta, common in Ohio elementary school cafeterias. The most vile substance ever served for lunch. Trivially easy to prepare, and cheap to make it is a favorite of school administrators.

My first experience with johnny marzetti was also my last. After that, I had my mom pack my lunch for me (in a Star Wars lunchbox).

by SkidMarkyMark October 18, 2006

scuddy

adj. The appearance and actions of a poor, inbred, usually white-trash person. Scuddy people live in trailers or backwoods shacks with no electricity or running water. Adults subsist on a diet of cigarettes, lite beer, and welfare cheese. Children subsist on a single meal per day: school lunch, with a particular affinity for tater tots. Because they tend not to have running water, scuddy people tend to smell horrible. This is a particularly popular term in Southern Ohio.

Once, in Junior High, I saw this scuddy kid dump Farley Wireman's tater-tots on the floor. He responded by beating him. Alas, Farley was so scuddy the blood remained on his sleeve for the remainder of the year. That was his only shirt.

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006