SkidMarkyMark's definitions

spankables

n. Pornography, specifically magazines or DVDs/video tapes. Used by Greg on an episode of "C.S.I."

I found someone's stash of spankables.

by SkidMarkyMark May 15, 2006

johnny package

n. A generic term that refers to any bland airheaded male, like a frat boy or underwear model. His signficant other is named "Muffy Imeasy."

Whoah! Check out Johnny Package and Muffy Imeasy over there at the GAP.

by SkidMarkyMark May 12, 2006

rubber peter

n. A dildo. A peter made of rubber.

In a classic "Brady Bunch" episode, Alice gets Peter to help her move a rubber tree plant into the bedroom, to get it out of the way so she can vacuum. They accidentally get locked in, and call to Bobby for help. He can't get the door open, so he runs to find his mom, and when he finally does he's out of breath and all he can get out is, "Mom...Alice...in the bedroom...rubber...Peter." And Mrs. Brady thinks Bobby has seen Alice masturbating with a rubber peter. Mrs. Brady screams, "Jesus Fucking Christ" and goes running off to the bedroom and kicks down the door. When she realizes her mistake, they all have a good laugh at it. This was the best Brady Bunch episode ever.

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

boortz

n. Small nuggets of squishy poo accidentally fired into one's undies after pushing a fart too hard. Name refers not only to the sound made by the poo, but also to a shithead clueless radio host.

Ralph Wiggum hiked up his trousers, stuck his finger in his nose and said, "I made boortz in my pants!"

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

reaches rock

v. to achieve an erection

"I am hard as a rock," said Congressman Foley to the 16-year-old boy, "so tell me when yours reaches rock."

by SkidMarkyMark October 3, 2006

dragon wagon

n. A car--generally either a hybrid, a 15-year-old station wagon, or a rustbucket Geo--that features this bumper sticker on the rear:

"Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."

It's actually legal to run this car off the road, pull the driver out, and beat them to death.

I saw a dragon wagon on the freeway the other day, so I killed the occupant, who was one of those annoying SCA types, before he could breed.

by SkidMarkyMark February 1, 2007

fruit salad

n. An item rumored to exist at certain parties, consisting of a bowl filled with random pills. Partygoers dip into the bowl and experience random effects.

Back in the '80s--the "Just Say No" era--in elementary school health class, they warned us of the dangers of fruit salad. Of course, such a thing has never existed, but the important thing was to scare us away from drugs.

by SkidMarkyMark August 2, 2006