SkidMarkyMark's definitions

freedom pinata

n. An Iraqi improvised explosive device (IED) that misses its intended target and is not, therefore, officially counted as an incidence of violence towards US Forces. Because maybe it's just how the Iraqis celebrate their wonderful new democracy, and wasn't really meant to hurt anyone.

An IED that doesn't involve US personnel? That's not an act of violence, that's a Freedom Pinata.

(Seen on fark.com)

by SkidMarkyMark December 7, 2006

spank tank

n. 1. The butt. In the same way a gas tank is filled up with gas, the spank tank may be filled up with a good spanking.

2. The mental database of naughty images to which one can spank the monkey when more conventional pornography is not, uh, "at hand."

1. Yo baby, come over here and lemme fill up yer spank tank.
2. My mom threw away all my porno mags. Now I have to rely on my spank tank.

by SkidMarkyMark May 15, 2006

fuck me in the ozarks

An epithet used to express extreme frustration. It's funny because it refers to Ned Beatty's character getting ass-rammed by hillbillies in the movie "Deliverance," while defeating the listener's expectation that an orifice, rather than a geographic location, will be mentioned as the terminal word. Originated by maddox.

"Fuck me in the Ozarks," screamed the alien when I threw water on him and he started melting.

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

boortz

n. Small nuggets of squishy poo accidentally fired into one's undies after pushing a fart too hard. Name refers not only to the sound made by the poo, but also to a shithead clueless radio host.

Ralph Wiggum hiked up his trousers, stuck his finger in his nose and said, "I made boortz in my pants!"

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

reaches rock

v. to achieve an erection

"I am hard as a rock," said Congressman Foley to the 16-year-old boy, "so tell me when yours reaches rock."

by SkidMarkyMark October 3, 2006

rubber peter

n. A dildo. A peter made of rubber.

In a classic "Brady Bunch" episode, Alice gets Peter to help her move a rubber tree plant into the bedroom, to get it out of the way so she can vacuum. They accidentally get locked in, and call to Bobby for help. He can't get the door open, so he runs to find his mom, and when he finally does he's out of breath and all he can get out is, "Mom...Alice...in the bedroom...rubber...Peter." And Mrs. Brady thinks Bobby has seen Alice masturbating with a rubber peter. Mrs. Brady screams, "Jesus Fucking Christ" and goes running off to the bedroom and kicks down the door. When she realizes her mistake, they all have a good laugh at it. This was the best Brady Bunch episode ever.

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

johnny package

n. A generic term that refers to any bland airheaded male, like a frat boy or underwear model. His signficant other is named "Muffy Imeasy."

Whoah! Check out Johnny Package and Muffy Imeasy over there at the GAP.

by SkidMarkyMark May 12, 2006