SkidMarkyMark's definitions

jerky treats

n. Hand jobs. Term first heard on C.S.I. on 1 Feb 2007. Plays off the phrase jerk off, while managing to sound innocuous--like a dog treat.

"Did you have sex with the clients?"
"No, just jerky treats."

by SkidMarkyMark February 6, 2007

wiggle pigs

n. A synonym for white ladies' breasts. Imagine two little pink piglets squirming and jiggling around. They might look like a pair of C- to D-cup tits.

Hey, baby, how about you lose that shirt and let me play with your wiggle pigs.

by SkidMarkyMark April 30, 2010

moo

n. Syn. for "mother." Orig.: Used by childfree people to indicate disdain for motherhood, the concept being that anyone dumb enough to breed is little better than a mindless cow with sagyy udders.

I was enjoying a stroll in the park when some dopey moo whipped her flabby jugs out to tit-feed her sprog.

by SkidMarkyMark May 4, 2006

Ben's Chili Bowels

n. A gastrointestinal problem suffered after eating food from Washington, DC's "Ben's Chili Bowl" restaurant. They serve the world's nastiest chili, and it will fuck you up good. Expect it to kick in about five hours after eating there, and plan on spending the next four hours or so on the toilet, spraying out high-pressure jets of liquishit that will burn your anus and permanently stain your toilet's porcelain.

Pbbbththth squirrrrrrrrrtt dribbledribbledribble flibberappappappapp pooooooooooooot pbbbbbthththththt splash. "Oh god, I'm suffering from Ben's Chili Bowels! Make it stop!!!"

by SkidMarkyMark October 23, 2009

johnny marzetti

n. A casserole composed of low-grade ground beef, onions, crushed tomatoes, tomato sauce, and pasta, common in Ohio elementary school cafeterias. The most vile substance ever served for lunch. Trivially easy to prepare, and cheap to make it is a favorite of school administrators.

My first experience with johnny marzetti was also my last. After that, I had my mom pack my lunch for me (in a Star Wars lunchbox).

by SkidMarkyMark October 18, 2006

wedding ring

n. A magical artifact that provides the wearer protection from receiving oral sex.

It's not just a wedding ring, it's a +5 Ring of Protection against oral sex.

by SkidMarkyMark May 28, 2006

johnny package

n. A generic term that refers to any bland airheaded male, like a frat boy or underwear model. His signficant other is named "Muffy Imeasy."

Whoah! Check out Johnny Package and Muffy Imeasy over there at the GAP.

by SkidMarkyMark May 12, 2006