Definitions by QuacksO
tobacco-free campus
A college or workplace where the management falsely lures prospective students/employees by using deceptive wording on their property-rules signs.
Disgruntled newbie college student: Dag-blast this university and their "tobacco-free campus" signs --- here I'd thought they'd be giving away cigarettes to anyone who signed up for classes!
tobacco-free campus by QuacksO May 24, 2016
Little Red Hen disorder
Lazy moocher's syndrome --- indolent people's being unwilling to help out in the earning/creation of something desirable, yet being only too eager to "assist" in partaking of the sweet rewards upon completion of the endeavor.
My neighborhood buddies never seem to want to help me collect returnable cans/bottles, yet after I cash in, they are always super-agreeable to stroll downtown with me to go to the fast-food joint! Sounds like Little Red Hen disorder to me... :P
Little Red Hen disorder by QuacksO April 25, 2016
infartuation
Refers to a feeling of strong amorous attraction to another human that causes one's colon to inadvertently produce a sizable expellation of methane. Similar to asspirations, but not necessarily with the accompanying desire to be given ass by the sought-after individual; the farter may simply want to hold hands, cuddle, and otherwise "be close" with the admired person.
I had a major infartuation with Tiffany when I first laid eyes on her, and I was afraid that she would be turned off. But fortunately we were outside at the time and there was a lot of noisy traffic, so she never noticed my anal indiscretion, and thus she was totally cool with letting me chat her up and hanging out together for a while.
infartuation by QuacksO January 10, 2016
public condomnation
1. The act of performing "raincoated" intercourse in front of a crowd of people, to demonstrate/promote the practice of safe sex.
2. Noisy/widespread denouncement of latex-based birth control in favor of abstinence or rhythm-based copulation. In this case, the term is often uttered in a sarcastic/disgusted tone, where the speaker feels that the outspoken actor is behaving hypocritically, since he himself either does not actually practice celibacy/safe sex, or he does other obnoxious/abrasive/irresponsible actions in his own life that cause others far more burden/emotional pain/distress than would be produced by young lovers' having sex while wearing protection.
2. Noisy/widespread denouncement of latex-based birth control in favor of abstinence or rhythm-based copulation. In this case, the term is often uttered in a sarcastic/disgusted tone, where the speaker feels that the outspoken actor is behaving hypocritically, since he himself either does not actually practice celibacy/safe sex, or he does other obnoxious/abrasive/irresponsible actions in his own life that cause others far more burden/emotional pain/distress than would be produced by young lovers' having sex while wearing protection.
I get so totally turned off by those bible-blabbers and their public condomnations on the radio every week , especially when we all know that a good half of them secretly screw around themselves when nobody's watching!
public condomnation by QuacksO October 27, 2015
sexual blackout dates
Those dreaded 5-to-10 days of the month when a girl has to deny "downstairs access" to the special guy in her life.
Horny stud: I try to time my monthly visits to my gal's house so that I don't arrive during her sexual blackout dates.
sexual blackout dates by QuacksO April 24, 2015
Rear-view cleavage
The groove between one's buttocks, sometimes visible if the person bends over too far, or if his/her pants/shorts are too short/loose. Unlike a buxom girl's chest-cleavage, a sumptuous-sized endowment "back there" is not an alluring feature, as a girl is considered **more** attractive/desirable if she has a **small** cute round rump.
Wistful stud: I sure wish I could find a bosomy gal with a nice firm little ass --- all of the chesty chicks I've befriended so far have had a rear-view cleavage that's at least as ample as their chest-meat.
Rear-view cleavage by QuacksO April 9, 2015
"free kittens" deal
Refers to an offer/proposal/situation where the items or circumstances appear to be favorable or legitimate as they are initially presented, but then turn out to be a "bottomless pit" of required labor, responsibility, and/or financial resources.
A brand new ink-jet printer for only $29.95 may seem like a bargain, but it's actually a "free kittens" deal, because replacing the ink cartridges will cost more than the printer.
"free kittens" deal by QuacksO March 4, 2015