Pipe Downn's definitions

Jog on

Get lost; piss off.

British slang, wrongly believed by many to originate from the 2004 Nick Love film "The Football Factory".

The expression, however, has a far longer history - dating back in Scotland to at least the 1640s, when it appears in Francis Semphill's popular song "Maggie Lauder"

Jog on your gait, ye blatherskate,
My name is Maggie Lauder.

(Get on your way, you bletherer,
My name is Maggie Lauder.)

by Pipe Downn November 13, 2013

farage

A sex act similar to the act of roughage, but passive, and involving bank clerks.

M'lud, the prosecution will show that the defendant, on the night of December 10th, did indeed engage in an act of farage - and that he was moreover no stranger to the practice of faraging.

by Pipe Downn June 21, 2011

gigaboo

One thousand megaboos

My iPhone has a gigaboo of boo

by Pipe Downn June 6, 2011

lardware

A cooler name for bloatware.

Software which, through continuous update in an attempt to screw more money out of existing users, has become overlarge, unwieldy or slow to use.

Software can't become hardware, but it can become lardware.

Nero burning software, 1.5 GB for installation.

by Pipe Downn June 8, 2011

catflap

Arse. Ass. The fudge tunnel. The marmite mine. The "porcelain pebbledasher".

Used particularly to describe the potential adjacence of that region to one's foot.

You waantin a kick up the catflap, ya prick?

by Pipe Downn December 10, 2011

fuck all

To have total sex: to have sex with everything.

Some people like to have sexual intercourse with individuals.

But I am bigger than that.

I will do nothing less than fuck all.

by Pipe Downn March 30, 2009

shampoo

A fake turd.

Derived from combination of sham and poo.

I thought the dog had managed to crap in the bathroom cabinet, but it was just shampoo.

by Pipe Downn March 21, 2010