Sad individual who spends whole evenings in a pub or club hovering round a woman hoping for a bit of action.
by Nuphagus December 19, 2019
I had a tortoise head! The girls were all chatting and I had bit of old tissue in my pocket, so I dived in the hedge and turned one out! It was the perfect plopportunity.
by Nuphagus February 26, 2020
I’ve started wearing button fly jeans now. Every time I do up a zip I seem to bum the hamster. It kills the end of my todger and hurts like heck trying to get it back out again!
by Nuphagus December 11, 2019
Horrence was up to his usual bumguffery at Reg and Hilda’s golden wedding anniversary. Reg was just giving his speech. He said ,”I’m lucky enough to say I’ve spent half a century married to this wonderful...”, and Horrence let one go at about 100 decibels!
by Nuphagus March 14, 2020
by Nuphagus December 19, 2019
I heard that if you’re naughty, Ganesh, the elephant god, will come out of your cupboard and hoover your toys up his trunk. I think it’s just a turban myth.
by Nuphagus December 26, 2019
I heard banging and swearing outside this morning. I looked out and Rex was smashing up his old Japanese motor with a sledgehammer! I reckon he’s got corollavirus!
by Nuphagus March 14, 2020