Definitions by Nuphagus
Transitvestite
“This right munter turned up on site in a white van the other day. I thought she must be health and safety or something. About half hour later she started bumping out concrete blocks with hands like shovels! Then I noticed the hairy legs and size 12 steelys! The woman was a geezer! A proper transitvestite!”
Transitvestite by Nuphagus November 24, 2019
Scuffing the china
“Bruv, I swear, he had proper o.c.d! He said if I was having a poo, to make sure I used the loo brush! Ha! I done a massive dump and left a big skid down the back of his throne! He’ll ban me from his gaff for scuffing the China! It stank! Then I left.”
Scuffing the china by Nuphagus November 20, 2019
Milking the yellow teats
“Mate, I bet you’re gonna be milking the yellow teats before you meet that bird tomorrow. You’ve got a face like a page from a Braille book in large print!”
Milking the yellow teats by Nuphagus November 20, 2019
Scrotal recall
“My nads were killing me when I woke up and I didn’t know why. Then Barry came round and gave me scrotal recall. He said I grabbed hold of Linda’s norms and she booted me right in the queensburys!”
Scrotal recall by Nuphagus November 15, 2019
Backnose
“Crikey mate, have someone cracked their trolleys or as one of you sneezed out of ya backnose?” , “I hope you’ve got some baby wipes in the bog! I’ve got the itch cos I didn’t wipe my backnose properly!”
Whistling choc chips
“I think you need to check your grots Bruv. That one sounded like you whistled choc chips!”, “I had the trots so bad I had to throw four pairs of pants away yesterday. Every time I farted, I was whistling choc chips! It ruined the wedding.”
Whistling choc chips by Nuphagus November 14, 2019