The matriculated manlet is a silly, little manlet boy who is senselessly enrolled at a college or university. Here the completely delusional and diminutively dwarfed Oompa Loompa wastes his time (when not working shifts at the chocolate factory) by furiously staring at all the tall and happy couples who walk around the campus like the bitter and envious peewee manlet that he is, crying all alone in the girl's bathroom after being asked by campus security if he was there for Take Your Daughter to Work Day and if he had lost his daddy and by being stuffed into backpacks, lockers, trashcans, lunchboxes, drawers, toilets, empty cigarette packs, pencil cases and used condoms like the inherently effeminate and minusculely malformed midget manlet bully magnet that he was always destined to be. When not being examined microscopically while standing on a petri dish by horrified microbiology students, the matriculated manlet is free to indulge in his true passions of girlishly practicing his bumbling cheerdance routine in an effort to become the captain of the local manlet football cheer squad and undergoing a brutal hazing ritual in order to join the only fraternity that would accept him, the Sigma Beta Manlet, by engaging in a fight to the death against fourteen other oiled up, bikini-clad midgets in an electrified bird cage.
Emma: Hey, why is that matriculated manlet tearfully ranting about women while sitting in his BMW in the parking lot over there? I could barely understand his manletspeak. Why all of the manlet rage? Isabella: He approached me, introduced himself as the supreme gentleman and brusquely told me to get in his car so that I can delight in his fabulousness and magnificence. I simply looked down at him and laughingly called him a petite and utterly insignificant little manlet fairy and then he just ran away crying to his Manletmobile. Emma: Manlets, when will they learn?
by ManletDepreciator September 16, 2024
A time when a bunch of minuscule manlets get together to whine about having spent another torturous weekend alone as always and to mentally prepare themselves for an undoubtedly horrific week of constant humiliation and well-deserved bullying due to their laughably obvious manletism and abominable Napoleon complex. The stunted and diminutive manlet boys usually dance around wearing Oompa Loompa costumes while listening to Short People, thusly worshipping their idol Randy Newman in a futile and desperate bid to be finally blessed with an invaluable and long-awaited growth spurt.
Lol, why are those sissy manlets dressed up as Oompa Loompas holding hands over there? It must be Manlet Monday. Those midget monstrosities are probably waddling to the nearest hobbit-hole. Good. I don't want no short people around here.
by ManletDepreciator August 14, 2024
The greatest song of all time and the anthem of manletism. The legendary first song of Randy Newman's aptly named and superlative 1977 album Little Criminals. This musical masterpiece catapulted the already illustrious Newman to well-deserved international fame and fortune and cemented his status as an absolute legend of the entertainment industry. Short People has blessed the six-foot tall Randy Newman with a fanatical following of rabid manlet fanboys who delight in the fact that Saint Newman, as they affectionately call him, lives a luxurious lifestyle and will undoubtedly enjoy a kingly retirement ascribable to the magnificent song that has enriched their lowly lives so much.
Did you know that Short People was a smash hit on the radio, reaching its zenith at number two of the Billboard Hot 100 for three consecutive weeks? Imagine being a silly, little manlet boy driving to work with Short People constantly playing on the radio and everybody at work laughing at you. Manlets BTFO. Short people got nobody. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 23, 2024
A hotly debated subject amongst online height enthusiasts for more than a decade now, Tiny Todd "Tippy Toes" Howard's truthful height has been difficult to precisely ascertain due to the sheer number of Todd Howard's tall tales brought on by his self-evident Napoleon complex deluxe and his manletism-induced proclivity for wearing a wide variety of Todd Howard's high heels in a laughably futile attempt at concealing his eternal status as a diminutively dwarfed runt of a girlishly gnomish sissy manlet boy who would be the belle of the ball in a women's prison. In what is perhaps the most egregiously blatant example of manlet mathematics and guy height in the history of humanity, Tiny Todd "Heckled Homunculus" Howard hilariously had the childish audacity to publicly declare his height to be 6ft2! Clearly this is complete and utter manlet cope because Todd "Stacked Heels" Howard's actual height is 5ft5. The same height as a 13-year-old girl.
Penny: Lol, did you see the photo of Little Napoleon Howard shamefully standing on his tiptoes at the 2015 Fallout 4 launch event? Veronika: Absolutely mortifying! What's Todd Howard's height? Penny: Tiny Todd stands small at 5ft5 - what a petite, little manlet boy he is! Veronika: Just brutal. Short people got no reason. Penny: Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator September 24, 2024
The perpetually petulant, paranoid and pessimistic petite misanthropic manlet is an isolated loner manlet who childishly shuns the company of grown-ups and instead prefers to focus his girlishly giddy energy on pursuing his numerous hobbies, including but not limited to: alcoholism, compulsively measuring his immutably dwarfed height every five minutes, e-shopping for children's clothes and high heels, daydreaming about getting pegged by a seven-foot tall dominatrix while he sings Short People in his high-pitched and squeaky-voiced manletspeak, performing delusional height increasing stretching exercises while listening to Skee-Lo's "I wish" and wearing nothing but high heels and a training bra, venting his manlet rage by ranting about how all women (righteously) reject and laugh at him at his local Bagel Boss and putting the finishing touches on his manlet manifesto before shooting up his favorite Barbie Dreamhouse due to the Barbie doll he was crushing on calling him an inherently effeminate, microscopically infinitesimal stunted beastling of a sissy manlet boy when she caught him in the Dreamhouse manlet pit as the deranged low IQ manlet was stupidly attempting to give the, by comparison towering, Ken doll a standing blowjob.
Emma: Lol, why is that misanthropic manlet furiously dry humping that garden gnome over there? Allison: It's because manlets can't be choosers. Emma: Short people got nobody. Allison: Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator September 11, 2024
A deleteriously diminutive, overcompensating and money-grubbing manlet boy who futilely seeks to overcome his devastatingly desolating manletism by imprudently purchasing expensive goods such as gold-plated high heels and jewel-encrusted step stools. The puny materialistic manlet can often be detected as he effeminately prances around in upscale boutiques, accompanied by his giggling and squabbling clique of preposterously petite, pint-sized materialistic manlet girlfriends. Here the seriously stunted silly sissy manlets put on tiny, little fashion shows by daintily skipping along a catwalk consisting of an empty shoe box as the delusional runway manlets delightedly display their prospective new short shorts, summer dresses and high heels while the surrounding fawning manlet fairies shower them with rose petals and girlishly sip strawberry margaritas out of pink ampoules.
Manmore 1: Lol, look at that garishly dressed materialistic manlet prancing around wearing his new mink coat and gold-plated high heels! Manmore 2: At least it only cost one poor minklet his life to make that microscopic manlet's lilliputian, little coatlet. Manmore 1: Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 29, 2024
Next to being infamous for telling transparent tall tales about video games and his severely stunted short stature, Tiny Todd "Homunculus" Howard is rightfully looked down upon for his dwarflike greed, compulsive Napoleon complex-driven need to micromanage everything going on around but mostly above him and especially for his manletism-induced small-mindedness and short fuse. A fact that is hilariously evidenced by the numerous paintings found in Fallout 4 depicting Tiny Todd "Human Growth Hormone" Howard as the microscopic Little Napoleon that he obviously is. It is rumored that even simple questions and requests, such as: "Are you Todd Howard's son? Where's your daddy, little boy?", "Are you the midget prostitute I ordered? You seem a little short..." or "Give me a high five!" can trigger Todd "Manlet Rage" Howard into throwing a Bagel Boss Manlet level hissy fit. Manlets, when will they learn?
Manmore 1: Do you think that the inclusion of the dwarfed rageaholic jester manlet Cicero in Skyrim was an allusion to Todd Howard's short fuse? Manmore 2: Absolutely! That's as sure as short people got no reason - I would bet all of Todd Howard's high heels on that!
by ManletDepreciator September 24, 2024