Justclowntingz's definitions

Schrödinger’s baby

When you have condomless sex without any other contraceptives and you are in a simultaneous state of parenthood and near-miss until a few weeks later

Michael and I had a Schrödinger’s baby but it’s been seven weeks and morning sickness hasn’t started yet so I guess I’m not pregnant

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020

Zamboner

The act of using your erect penis to spread your jizz across a person’s body, in a similar fashion to the eponymously trademarked ice-rink cleaning invention by Frank Zamboni

Tony gave me a zamboner last night. It took me hours to clean everything off

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020

Student loans

The practice of giving depressed teenagers tens of thousands or more in debt with no financial experience or context

Johnny has $100,000 in student loans for an art degree, and he works at McDonalds!

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020

spontaneous gay abortion

The process of accidentally leaking splooge from one’s anus after receiving gay anal intercourse, particularly after a larger encounter.

After a long night of fornicating with the boys, I fell asleep before using the bathroom and had a spontaneous gay abortion in my sleep and woke up to a nasty surprise

by Justclowntingz January 2, 2023

Useful idiot

A term specific to Washington D.C. for “voters”

Boomers are such useful idiots

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020

Judge Judy

A term for a verbal degradation kink; When one is sexually aroused by being verbally abused by their partner. It may also be applied to specific role-play situations.

1. I’m such a Judge Judy, I love talking shit in bed.
2. Michael Judge Judy’d me last night and it was kind of hot

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020

Onision

A child groomer

Onision is a child groomer

by Justclowntingz May 14, 2020