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JustAnotherSickFuckOnUrbanDic's definitions

The bible

If you want to see the biggest pile of horse shit in the universe, then read the bible. It`s so full of lies and absolute BULLSHIT that you begin to question why so many people have been infected by the disease that is christianity. The bible says you can`t masturbate, that`s bullshit! The bible says you can`t swear, that`s bullshit too. The bible says you can`t be gay, that`s even bigger bullshit!

Don`t read the bible because the bible is shit
Jack: You should read the bible
Fred: You expect me to buy into that fucking shit?
Jack: It`s not shit, it`s what god wanted the world to be
Fred: well your god can suck my dick
by JustAnotherSickFuckOnUrbanDic November 26, 2020
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Dongademon

A dongademon is a humanoid monster with a large penis, their cocks can be very long, perhaps ordinary looking at first, but their erections can be long, like from 7 meters to a staggering 10 thousand kilometers! Their cocks are hard but flexible and can move around like a snake. A dongademon's dick will not be penetrated by anything weaker than steel, this feature can be used for swordfighting. Dongademons can ejaculate on command and really powerful ones can shoot fire, ice and lightning out of their dicks. Extremely powerful, horny, rock hard perverted dongademons can conjure anything out of their cocks, those dongademons are very rare and are usually the leaders of a dongademon group. Every dongademon is different and there are unlimited possibilities of what powers a dongademon`s cock can possess.

(Inspired by the definition: donga)
Ellen: Oh Jack! Your cock is so huge!
Jack: I know, and I would fuck you all day and make a porno out of you and...
Ellen: Wait, Jack, it hurts! IT HURTS!!! AAAAAGH!!!
Jack (slightly more demonic voice): Holy fuck, what`s happening to my cock? It`s like 2 meters long and 4 inches thick!
Ellen: Oh... fuck...
Jack: *gets really horny*
Ellen: runs away
Jack: *thinks: why am I so horny*
*blast of cum knocks Jack off his feet*
Jack: what was that?
Dongademon (higher pitched voice): Greetings, I am Evilcock, I am a dongademon!
Jack: What`s a dongademon?
Evilcock: A dongademon is someone with a giant cock with superpowers who is really horny.
Jack: So I must be a dongademon then.
Evilcock: Yes, you are, now cum to my mansion, I will show you what it means to be a dongademon.
by JustAnotherSickFuckOnUrbanDic January 20, 2021
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Tander

Someone who did something wrong by accident; or rather, someone who had good intentions but ended up messing up terribly. This word is derived from Henry Tandey; a British soldier who, during the first world war, stumbled upon a German soldier, wounded and helpless. Tandey simply could not bring himself to just shoot this wounded man in cold blood, and so he refused to shoot him, thinking it was an act of kindness, thus sparing the life of 29 year-old lance corporal Adolf Hitler. In summary; had Henry just shot Hitler, he'd probably had just saved over six million lives, plus the 11 million that would die as a result of the second world war (That was nearly 1% of the world's population at the time).

Because the tander does not know that their good intentions are the shit that will hit the fan, they are technically innocent; depending on how one is to view the situation, of course.

Famous examples of tanders include: Henry Tandey, Qui-Gon Jinn, Alfred Nobel, and whoever cooked the bat soup.
Tashira: Why is this town so divided? I wish everyone would stop fighting and hating each-other!
Ellen: It's all Mike's fault! He started all this by writing that weird E-mail!
Cindy: Nah; Mike's a tander; he couldn't possibly have predicted this.
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Chaos whore

Someone who tries to cause as much drama and havoc as they possibly can purely for their own entertainment. A chaos whore will do almost anything to cause chaos in their nearby environment depending on how bored they are; they will destroy friendships, ruin lives, and burn down nations simply for the thrill of the drama it creates. Chaos whores will go as far as to lie, steal, cheat, kill, and sabotage just to entertain themselves. Stay safe out there, folks!
Zack: Did you hear the rumors?
Ellen: What rumors?
Zack: That Jack killed Tashira!
Ellen: And who told you that?
Zack: Kevin, he said Jack told him he did it.
Ellen: You believed Kevin? That fucking chaos whore lies all the time!
by JustAnotherSickFuckOnUrbanDic October 11, 2021
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Minor

A stupid made -up word by the government for people who`s will they don`t recognize, the reason that porn and other such things have retarded things called age restrictions on them. If such restrictions were implemented based on maturity, knowledge, and ability instead of age (with the exception of smoking, vaping, and drinking), this world would be a much greater place.
Zack: Yo, can I buy this condom?
Cashier: Sorry, you can`t buy this, you`re a minor.
Zack: So the fuck what? That doesn`t matter, I can be responsible!
Cashier: Well, I wish I could let you, but if I did, I`d be jailed for life.
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Carry the 1

A phrase used to acknowledge something obvious that another has been missing, similar in nature to "Use your head" or "Read between the lines."
Darth Vader: No, I am your father!
Luke: No, that`s not true, that`s impossible!!
Darth Vader: Carry the 1, Luke, I thought it was obvious!
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69420

A multiple of 89 and 780.

The act of performing simultaneous oral sex (69) while hitting a bong. (420)
Person 1: Hey, did you know that 69420 is a multiple of 89?
Person 2: 89? What's that?
Person 1: Titty fucking.

Person 2: Oh, right. Titty fucking is nice. Wait.... 69420 is a multiple of 89?

Person 1: Yes. 89 x 13 = 1157 x 6 = 6942 x 10 obviously = 69420. Weren't you paying attention in math class?

Person 2: 69 is nice, 420 is nice, and so is 89. So if 69420 is a multiple of 89, that makes it triple nice!

Catholic: But it's also a multiple of 13. So it's unholy. The preachers weren't lying when they said sex and drugs were evil.
Person 2: Fuck off, catholic!

Catholic: Alright then. Good luck burning in hell....
Person 1: YOU go burn in hell!

Catholic: I can't. God will grant me my worthy place in heaven.
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