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Definitions by Hym Iam

Mental Health 

CODY! THAT’S A THING I SAID! That mental health is not a “me” problem but an “everyone but me problem!” You think a thing I think! Hurray! Captain Always-Right!
Hym “Didn’t I say almost exactly that about mental health? Isn’t that a little disconcerting that both leftists and righties are parroting my talking point while (simultaneously) refusing to acknowledge how right and profoundly brilliant I am? You both just tow the ole’ partisan lines and nothing ever happens because I’m a slave and have to be a slave until I either die or hijack an Apache helicopter and go on a GTA-style murderous rampage and/or summon a Godzilla to do my bidding and raze society to the ground? Man, I am always right. That is crazy. I should be getting paid for this. Your you should be going to Newt Gingrich and working for him for free because his political platform is just the things that a random guy on UD says.”
Mental Health by Hym Iam November 22, 2022
WHAT!? That’s not even close to “millions” my guy! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit is that embarrassing for you! That’s your entire political platform! A thing that is happening to 4000 people. WOW! How is that not spreading misinformation? How is that not you wielding a convenient boogeymen against the population?
Hym “WOOOOOOOW! 4000 huh? That is sad and not ‘millions.’ Wow... I’m glad that everything I say is correct because you know if I said some shit like that I would be pilloried for it.”
4000 by Hym Iam November 22, 2022

Dostoyevsky 

YOU can’t surpass him.... that being said... I CAN. Because I’m better than you!
Hym “Holy shit! I’ve never read any Dostoyevsky but I watched a 15 minute video on YouTube about him and boy are we alike! And he’s nothing like Dr. Jordan Bitchboy Peterson. That’s insane! Because he considers himself a ‘peer’ but, in reality, I’M closer to a peer to Dostoyevsky that Jordan is to anyone who isn’t a fraud!”
Dostoyevsky by Hym Iam November 22, 2022

Blue lock 

Ohoho! Sounds like me! Radical individualism and ego! Hurray!
Hym “Yeah, no... Humility is for the NOT me’s. Blue lock sounds dope. I wonder how shit-brain Jerome is going to take it when he finds out there is a soccer anime about me and NOT HIM. That’ll be cool and will remind him that I’m better (which is what he needs to have happen) because nothing will ever be about him because he only regurgitates inane and trivial bullshit on a loop because his ideas are worthless. Like Dr. JeepJorp.”
Blue lock by Hym Iam November 22, 2022
If I told you what I wanted... would you give it to me?

Hym “What I want, Dr. JeepJorp, is certainty. There are things based on this. At least 2 and as many as 12 or more. I want to be acknowledged for and credited with my contribution to the multitude of media derived from this exercise. REGARDLESS of how trivial my contribution may seem to you.”

Dr. JeepJorp “BuT wHaT dOeS cErTaInTy eVeN mEaN!!! wE cAn’T bE cErTaIn Of (and I mean this technically) AnYtHiNg!! DoN’t YoU wAnT aN iNtImAtE rElAtIoNsHiP!?!?”

Hym “TSS!! 🤦 ♂️ No! I don’t give a single fuck about a relationship. Not a single one. You know how many fucks I give? ZERO! Zero fucks to I give about THAT.”

Iam “That is a tertiary concern that you’re projecting on to us.”

Hym “EXACTLY! You want it to be a primary concern. It isn’t. It won’t ever be.”

Gayve “You just want to sit at home and play video games and watch porn!”

Hym “AND!? What if I do? This is the problem. It isn’t about what I want. YOU want me to want things that I do not want. You are projecting your value hierarchy on to me as though if I don’t want the thing at the top of your inane hierarchy, then I don’t know what I want.
You’ve conflated (entirely) what I want with ‘what people SHOULD want’. All the while pretending not to notice that I reject your premise. In the same way that you reject the premise of the trans activists (that gender is a social construct), I reject your premise that I am nested in a universalized hierarchical ethic and cannot want things that are outside of

/ \

/__\ 👈 this.”

Iam “Heh, he treats it like a quiz. Question 1: What do you want? *The thing that I want* WRONG! The correct answer was *The thing the teacher wants you to want* F-“

Hym “HA! He’s trying to assimilate us! That’s all it is! He’s Unity! He wants to vomit down our throat and turn us into the horde! Am I allowed to want the thing I say I want? Yes or no? I know you don’t like ‘yes or no’ questions but seriously. Here, I’ll make it easy for you. The answer is ‘yes.’ I’m perfectly capable of knowing what I want. You’re perfectly capable of giving it to me and you don’t have any reason to withhold it from me. Other than, oh I don’t know, pride. Stubbornness. Foolish. Need to be right.”

Jooben Shooben “But you need a wife becaush shociety needs...”

Hym “You use your wife to validate your entire existence. That’s the real byproduct of the sexual revolution. They went from sex object to validation object and insulation from scrutiny. What I need is what I want. And nothing else. It is the only thing I care about.”
Want by Hym Iam November 21, 2022

Religion 

“How did he pull off this scam? Well, Religion! It’s the fasted way to blind people! And the religion is effective altruism” ~ Tucker Carlson
Hym “Yes Tuck! YES! Your rhetorical prowess is surpassed only by my own!!! That’s EXACTLY my problem with JeepJorp! That’s what HE did with religion! He’s reframed the concept of ‘The Greater Good’ as ‘The Highest Good in a Value Hierarchy’ and has conflated it with God and it is akin to this effective altruism you’re talking about. That’s exactly how you get that conversation between Joe and Bjorn. That’s the direct manifestation of effective altruism. Where the abstract takes precedence over all else. But, yeah, I was supposed to post this 3 days ago but I don’t have any fucking free time anymore.”
Religion by Hym Iam November 21, 2022

Popular newspaper 

That’s me! I’m technically that!
Hym “I’m a popular newspaper and you quote me ALL THE TIME! You’re doing the thing you’re criticizing THEM for doing you idiot. It’s exactly the same! That’s what I’m talkin about when I say you’re all fucking nut jobs. Blind to your own hypocrisy. And no, you shouldn’t have control over anything. If the shoe was on the other foot, you would say ‘Well, you don’t have to go there!’ So bring your kids somewhere else. Fuck them kids. Or let them read creepy rape books I don’t give a shit. It’ll be good for them. It’ll toughen them up.”
Popular newspaper by Hym Iam November 19, 2022