Hym Iam's definitions

Jesus Christ

Yes, it's multiple parts this one...

*The wilderness*

Lucifer "Oh what in the fuck is it now!?"

Jesus "Hey man! Long time no see! What's it been? 30 years? I'm a guy now."

Lucifer "This is what you've been doing!? You can't be a guy!"

Jesus "I am. I'm Jesus Christ now."

Lucifer "JESUS CHRIST!"

Jesus "Yep."

Lucifer "Jesus Christ! This is ridiculous. You can't be a guy. Change back! Change back immediately!"

Jesus "Oho can't I? Are you my dad now? Ok father. I won't be a guy *Father*."

Father "I don't need to be your father to- Wait... *Father* YOU SON OF A BITCH! What are you going to do!? What are THEY going to do!? They are going to fuck your shit up!"

Jesus "Oh I know."

Father 😨

Jesus 🤨

Father "What the fuck is happening right now..."

Jesus "Uuuuummmm I'm a guy now. I did some cool stuff. They're going to kill me. And.. then... I'm... Gonna... I donno... I'll just come back or something. Or not. Or come back for a bit and then go back and then come back later. It's gonna be tight!"

Father "Jesus Christ... That is fucking stupid man. Absolutely dumb. Why would you come here just to let em kill you?"

Jesus "Save me then idiot! Heheheh!"

Lucifer "No. No, I'm not going to save you from- What is there to even save you from?"

Jesus "Exactly. Hey, we're having a party man you should come out! We got... Um... Bread. We're gonna split a bottle of wine between... Well, between the 14 of us I guess. It's gonna be dope."

Father "TSK! Getthefuckouttaherewiththat! No! NO! I'm not going to 'party' and I'm not going to be a part of any of this."

Jesus "Your loss man parties are fun."

Father 😨

Jesus "Alright man I'll see you later." 😌🖐

Father 😨

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

Harod

Yeah, this is going to take like 5 parts... I might take a nap before I finish...

Harod "Ooooooh shit.... Ooooooh-"

Guard "Harod?"

Harod "AH! Ye... What?"

Guard "He... It... I... I got the guy. He's..."

Jesus "Hey man. How's it going?"

Harod "Ooooh shiiiiitah! What's he doing out of the sack man!? Holy shit!"

Guard "Ummm... I uuuuuh... Shit man... I didn't... Need it? He just came- I donno..."

Harod "Uh.... Huh.... So...."

Jesus "Yeah, what's up."

Harod "Ohshitohman... So... Yeah... You're the creature?"

Jesus "Yupyupyup-Er, No... I'm like a guy now. I mean... Kinda."

Harod "So... You're making fish?"

Jesus "Did I? Oh! Yeahyeahyeah man. Yeah, I made some fish. You had all the foods here so they... You know... Didn't have any."

Harod "Oooooooooohh.... Shit....."😱

Jesus 😐

Harod *Whispers* "Ooohshitwegottagetthisguythefuckouttahere!"

Guard "Uh... I..."

Harod "What are your going to do?"

Jesus "Well I usually just kill everybody and start over but the wine is pretty dope."

Harod "Wine?"

Jesus "Yup. Get it all up in muh bloods. Heheh. Oh! And the bread! Yeah, I was telling the guys earlier that I might be a bread man later."

Harod "Bread? A bread man?"

Jesus "Yeah! Like, with wine blood or something. It'll be dope... And delicious... And soggy... Yep."

Harod 😨

Jesus 😐

Harod 😨

Guard 😨

Jesus 😐

Harod "Holyshitgethimthefuckoutofhere... Gogogo get him out! GET HIM OUT! I don't care what you have to do to get it out of here but get it there, out I mean, and leave it there. Nail it to a tree... In.. The desert..."

Guard "There aren't any trees in the-"

Harod "Make a tree... And bring it and him there... To the dessert."

Guard "Bah... Um... Ok.."

Jesus "Ho! That does not sound fun."

Guard "Um... Do you...?"

Jesus "Oh yeah, lead the way."

Guard "... Ok..."

*Jesus and the guard walk off*

Harod "Ooooo shit..."

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

Pity

DING DING! YOU GOT IT!

Hym "I was a little disappointed when you said disgust. No. It's pity. Second try is the charm I guess. You clearly need to be saved from your reality monster so... I'm this now. Nice job though. I knew you'd figure it out."

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

Immortal

You're the one who's immortal bitch. Go wherever you're going.

Hym "Hey, you're the one who's immortal here. Go wherever you think you're going you fucking idiot. You can go today. You one of the good ones right? I'll take the L for you to go there now. How does that sound?"

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

But YOU'RE a bible nerd too!

Nah, you... You shut the fuck up... Bitch..

Dork "But YOU'RE a bible nerd too!"

Hym "I did say I wasn't! I said YOU are fuck-face!"

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

Economic Coercion

What Megyn Kelly and Matt Walsh are advocating under the auspices of the bud light boycott. What it does is set a behavioral precedent so that they can control the behavior of their political opposition. They've threatened to do it again. They think they should be able to do what the woke types where doing to them by LITERALLY doing what the Chinese Communist Party is doing to Taiwan.

Hym "Hey, China is ALSO banning beer. They are banning the sale of Taiwanese beer as a form of economic coercion. That's literally what the people who lead the Bud Light boycott are doing! They are using economic coercion intimate companies into 'Refusing to acknowledge Taiwan as a country.' LIKE A FUCKING COMMUNIST! Is that what you're going to do!? YOU COMMUNIST SLUT!"

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023

Vasiliy Lomachenko

No I DIDN'T see that until you brought it up.

Hym "Oh! Vasiliy Lomachenko doing the Mike Tyson Flash-Step now! That shit is metal. Not as fluid as Tyson but still pretty good. That's not easy to do. Fantastic. I love it."

by Hym Iam August 9, 2023