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Definitions by How it is

cockmerchant 

n.
1. A person who deals with the sale and purchase of battery hens and cockerels.
2. Someone who annoys you so much, you decide to spread random rumours about them illiciting sexual favours, including sucking cock
3. An insult slightly less offensive to the general public than cunt or fuckwit.
Person "My my! That Dave Ankers is a right cockmerchant"
Person 2 "Fuck off you pumptious cunt"
cockmerchant by How it is April 8, 2005
tate.is.m
n.
1. an unnatural ability to isolate women. instead acting in a thoroughly pumpacious manner.
2. an unhealthy non-breathing problem when playing the guitar
3. the ability to entertain with strange head movements and knee-raising when playing the guitar
3. occasionally acting/looking like a cunt
"Oh dear. There goes Chris with another tateism"
"The problem with Chris is that he's prone to a tateism every now and again"
tateism by How it is April 7, 2005

badgermould 

n.
1. A strong desire for strange grey mounds, not unlike a badger, on the side of your head.
2. A small town in Scotland
3. A haircut for a pumpcious cunt
Wife "My look Arthur. That man has a right badgermould going on!"
Arthur "Why, that's André from Full Speed Alone!"
Wife "Oh yes. What a pumpcious cockmerchant"
badgermould by How it is April 7, 2005
mc·wab·b·ler
n.
1. Lack of skill when utilising the mouth. Lacking mental skill or adroitness. Done without dextirity.
2. Cunt
"In the 1950s, a young Luke McGowan learnt that opening his 'top-hole' only went to prove that he was a McWabbler. Oh, and a bit of a cunt, as let's be honset, you can't plosih a turd"
McWabbler by How it is April 6, 2005

Plightfiddler 

Pli.ght.fid.dle.r
n.
1. Taken from the Norsk word Pligfleck, which mean to masturbate violently. The meaning of this word is a connundrum of people who fail to grow out of obsessions with FHM and graduate to soft porn.
2. Cunt
"For christ's sake! Rob, Paul and Shaun are such Plightfiddlers!"
Plightfiddler by How it is April 6, 2005

pumptious 

pum.p.tio.us
adj.
1. Attempting to attract the desires of male suitors.
2. Being of an easy persuasion in regards to entering sexual intercourse with men
3. Cunt
"Christ that Luke McGowan is really pumptious today" or
"I don't mind Rob Gray, he's just far too pumptious"
pumptious by How it is April 6, 2005

Parking attendant 

n. (collective)
1. Springing from the lifeform that was the lowly Traffic Warden, these Council driven Plightfiddlers go around with an excessive desire to become Hitler. Worse cases are found in Plymouth, UK.
2. Cunts
"I can't stand their (Parking Attendants) pumptious, cunt-like attitude. They're all a bunch of plightfiddlers! I bet they're all McWabblers! Gits." TRH Tony Blair, Member of Parliament for Sedgefield, circa 1997
Parking attendant by How it is April 6, 2005