Failurebitch's definitions
A red alcoholic drink made from fermented fruit juice. It looks a lot like blood. Generally made from grapes and cherries.
Man, the first day of the zombie apocalypse, i got so fucking wasted by drinking a whole bottle of red wine and 3 shots of cherry vodka. I used the wine bottle to mercy 5 zombies while i was still drunk as Hell. Is that badass or what?
by Failurebitch January 29, 2019
Get the red winemug. The smartest woman in a given group of women. Generally one of the more psychologically attractive ones because she's nice, but not afraid to put a stupid female (whore) in her place for being a bitch by kicking said bitch's ass. Alpha females sometimes have a naturally occurring (meaning no plastic surgery) bra cup size of DD and up in addition to being smart, kind, and a total badass.
Characteristics of an Alpha Female:
Smart (IQ of 90 or higher)
Naturally large breasts (sometimes)
Badass
Brave
Kind
Independent
Not afraid of men
Fun to be around
Gets along with others
Good manners
Isn't a sex worker
Funny
Is either single or is in a relationship with only 1 person
Isn't a feminazi/feminist
Characteristics of an Alpha Female:
Smart (IQ of 90 or higher)
Naturally large breasts (sometimes)
Badass
Brave
Kind
Independent
Not afraid of men
Fun to be around
Gets along with others
Good manners
Isn't a sex worker
Funny
Is either single or is in a relationship with only 1 person
Isn't a feminazi/feminist
by Failurebitch November 29, 2022
Get the Alpha Femalemug. The most annoying thing women go through every month if they don't get pregnant. The cramps feel like being kicked in the groin repeatedly. On top of the pain, women also bleed for a week or so as the uterus sheds its lining. If a woman has endometriosis, then that week she'll be in moderate/severe pain and have heavy bleeding. Women will generally avoid swimming if tampons cause discomfort. They will also avoid wearing light colored/white pants, dresses, skirts, underwear, jumpsuits, and rompers incase there's a leak. The blood that comes out also smells bad, so a woman might smell a bit rank during that week. There have been women who've BEGGED doctors for a hysterectomy, but doctors won't do it because of the stupid notion that all women should have children when there's already more than enough people on the planet.
I want a hysterectomy so I won't have periods anymore, but I'm forced to suffer despite not wanting to have children because the government forces the doctor to say no. All of my underwear have embarrassing brown stains from dried blood. If I go a month without my birth control, I'll be in agony and have heavy bleeding because I might have endometriosis. My life is hell.
by Failurebitch March 11, 2025
Get the Periodsmug. A dog with a puckered face that always looks concerned due to the breeds it's mixed with, or a dog that's a Sharpei or Pug. They always look concerned, and it's the cutest thing ever!
by Failurebitch May 16, 2025
Get the Wrinkleface dogmug. An actress who's a bonafide mean girl, is anti-Semitic, narcissistic, entitled, bitchy, self-righteous, childish, sexist, bratty, and rude. Her lack of talent and terrible personality make period cramps and Mondays look like fun. She really gives Karen vibes.
Rachel Zegler will get offended when you tell her about her flaws because she thinks she's perfect. I, however, when mine are pointed out, will say: Welp, not much I can do about some of them since I'm stuck with some of them for life.
I could make a better Snow White than her.
I could make a better Snow White than her.
by Failurebitch March 7, 2025
Get the Rachel Zeglermug. A woman who only lets her kids listen to educational music and causes traffic jams at the local elementary school because they want to make sure their "perfect children" don't get hurt or killed while walking 10 feet to get to the door. Her kids are spoiled brats and act like the little shits they are in public. Soccer moms generally don't have a job, bleach their hair, and drive luxury mini vans. They're referred to as trophy wives as they wear tons of makeup and get their hair bleached once a week to make regular moms like mine feel bad. They don't let their kids use the internet because it's "violent" and "sexual", the kids can only watch PG and G rated movies, and play Minecraft for a video game.
Me: *Listening to Nicki Minaj
Soccer Mom: TURN THAT OFF, MY PRECIOUS BABY DOESN'T NEED TO HERE THAT!!
Me: *Turns it up
Soccer Mom: If you don't turn that off, I'm calling the police
Me: Bitch, shut the fuck up ya nigga!
Soccer Mom: TURN THAT OFF, MY PRECIOUS BABY DOESN'T NEED TO HERE THAT!!
Me: *Turns it up
Soccer Mom: If you don't turn that off, I'm calling the police
Me: Bitch, shut the fuck up ya nigga!
by Failurebitch May 29, 2018
Get the Soccer Mommug. There are 10 things that can cause an ass explosion:
1. Laxatives
2. Food allergies/intolerances
3. Medication side effects
4. Oily/greasy food
5. Eating too much plant fiber
6. Infectious diseases/food poisoning
7. Exposure to certain toxins
8. Chronic gastrointestinal conditions (IBS for example)
9. An imbalance of gut bacteria
10. Over-eating
11. Hormonal fluctuations (females)
Generally, you can tell if an ass explosion is going to happen, symptoms include:
Gas
Gurgling in the lower abdomen
Pressure behind the asshole that feels like something solid is trying to get out
Bloating
Slight abdominal cramping
1. Laxatives
2. Food allergies/intolerances
3. Medication side effects
4. Oily/greasy food
5. Eating too much plant fiber
6. Infectious diseases/food poisoning
7. Exposure to certain toxins
8. Chronic gastrointestinal conditions (IBS for example)
9. An imbalance of gut bacteria
10. Over-eating
11. Hormonal fluctuations (females)
Generally, you can tell if an ass explosion is going to happen, symptoms include:
Gas
Gurgling in the lower abdomen
Pressure behind the asshole that feels like something solid is trying to get out
Bloating
Slight abdominal cramping
by Failurebitch May 28, 2023
Get the ass explosionmug.