Dusty's Baby Powder's definitions
A workout done inside a chapel by Catholic priests. This was first done by SFC. Fr. Roger Stainglass when he's preaching a sermon. It mostly consists of three exercises called "God Squats", "Lord Lunges", and "Jehovah Jacks". Usually they are done in three or four rounds in quick succession. A circuit of this always ends by kneeling on the prayer bench and saying one Hail Mary before the next circuit begins. Stainy does this in the mornings before the early service. So if you want a religious workout that will really perk you, try a Communion Circuit - it can't hurt you! Stainy Stainglass said so!
Stainy: Hey Bryant, you feel like some exercise? Let's do our Communion Circuit. I need some stretches.
Bryant: Sure! Gotta have those warm up exercises now. I love these!
Stainy: Okay! First one, lets do some God Squats. (he stands in front of the prayer bench and squats down) Easy. Now hold it too long. Just stand there until it starts to burn.
Bryant: Wow! Good one. What's next?
Stainy: Next up is the Lord Lunge. You know how we priests kneel on one knee? You do that and then you quickly stand up again. That's the second part of a Communion Circuit. (he does a Lord Lunge to show Bryant)
Bryant: What's the third part?
Stainy: The Jehovah Jack. You jump up on top of the prayer bench and you do a couple of jumping jacks. Then you jump down and pray a Hail Mary. And then the circuit starts all over again. Great workout, huh?
Bryant: Yes, but after you do it is there a stretch that you do?
Stainy: Sure it is. The Saintly Stretches. Here, hold my hand. How, stretch all the way up into the sky. There sweetie. That's it. Communion Circuits rock, don't they?
Bryant: They sure do! They wake you up. I love doing these. They're better than Knee Mail!
Bryant: Sure! Gotta have those warm up exercises now. I love these!
Stainy: Okay! First one, lets do some God Squats. (he stands in front of the prayer bench and squats down) Easy. Now hold it too long. Just stand there until it starts to burn.
Bryant: Wow! Good one. What's next?
Stainy: Next up is the Lord Lunge. You know how we priests kneel on one knee? You do that and then you quickly stand up again. That's the second part of a Communion Circuit. (he does a Lord Lunge to show Bryant)
Bryant: What's the third part?
Stainy: The Jehovah Jack. You jump up on top of the prayer bench and you do a couple of jumping jacks. Then you jump down and pray a Hail Mary. And then the circuit starts all over again. Great workout, huh?
Bryant: Yes, but after you do it is there a stretch that you do?
Stainy: Sure it is. The Saintly Stretches. Here, hold my hand. How, stretch all the way up into the sky. There sweetie. That's it. Communion Circuits rock, don't they?
Bryant: They sure do! They wake you up. I love doing these. They're better than Knee Mail!
by Dusty's Baby Powder November 23, 2011
Get the Communion Circuit mug.An exercise done by Ralph Drabble after working in the yard. It is often accompanied by coaching his body parts as if he were actually talking to them. A wonderful way work off arthritis.
Ralph: Boy, I'm stiff. I've gotta do my Drabble Stand.
Ed: What's a Drabble Stand? Is that some sort of arthritis exercise?
Ralph: Yup, works great. Guaranteed relief.
Ed: Show me how, I've never tried it.
Ralph: (demonstrating) Come on, knee, you can do it!
Ed: What's a Drabble Stand? Is that some sort of arthritis exercise?
Ralph: Yup, works great. Guaranteed relief.
Ed: Show me how, I've never tried it.
Ralph: (demonstrating) Come on, knee, you can do it!
by Dusty's Baby Powder December 14, 2010
Get the Drabble Stand mug.A home-based school attended by the Drabble children, especially Penny and Patrick. It is taught by their father, Sergeant Ralph Drabble. Ralph is a tough teacher and often glares at his students when they don't do something he likes. This is the best place to learn how to be a mall cop. So if you think mall cops are pretty cool, check it out and go to Ralph School!
Ralph: OK, kids, you ready for Ralph School?
Penny: Right on, dad! I'm gonna love this.
Ralph: No, no sweetheart. At Ralph School I'm not Dad, its Mr. Drabble, OK?
Penny: (starts crying) But I've always called you Dad.
Ralph: Not in your Ralph School classes. (he gives her a gentle glare) See, Isn't this fun having me for a teacher?
Patrick: This is fun! Best school I know. Especially since you're our teacher!
Ralph: (starts laughing) Yes, this is like mall cop therapy. Ralph School is crazy! Class dismissed! (he glares at them again) Ralph School rules!
Penny: Right on, dad! I'm gonna love this.
Ralph: No, no sweetheart. At Ralph School I'm not Dad, its Mr. Drabble, OK?
Penny: (starts crying) But I've always called you Dad.
Ralph: Not in your Ralph School classes. (he gives her a gentle glare) See, Isn't this fun having me for a teacher?
Patrick: This is fun! Best school I know. Especially since you're our teacher!
Ralph: (starts laughing) Yes, this is like mall cop therapy. Ralph School is crazy! Class dismissed! (he glares at them again) Ralph School rules!
by Dusty's Baby Powder September 15, 2011
Get the Ralph School mug.The condition of having used coco butter and honey lotion. Often given in the form of a massage or beauty treatment. This is most notably seen in Opal Crankshaft, but has also been seen in others, such as her husband, Earl.
Opal: Just look at your hands. They're like a snake.
Earl: Yeah, maybe I need to be honeyhanded.
Opal: Yeah, you should try that lotion we always use. It has honey in it.
Earl: Well, I didn't like it at first. But maybe I should try it again.
Opal: Here, sweetie, I'll honey your hands for you!
Earl: Yeah, maybe I need to be honeyhanded.
Opal: Yeah, you should try that lotion we always use. It has honey in it.
Earl: Well, I didn't like it at first. But maybe I should try it again.
Opal: Here, sweetie, I'll honey your hands for you!
by Dusty's Baby Powder November 29, 2010
Get the Honeyhanded mug.its an abdominal exercise created and done by Ben Cranston. Done by standing someone on your chest and then doing a situp so they crunch against you.
Ben: Boy, this Cranston Crunch is a real ab killer!
Opal: What's a Cranston Crunch? I've never tried that.
Ben: You're gonna love it. Stand on my belly, I'll show you what it is.
Patty: Easy, dad, she might fall off.
Ben: (Laughing) Who cares?! Its a real gut buster.
Opal: What's a Cranston Crunch? I've never tried that.
Ben: You're gonna love it. Stand on my belly, I'll show you what it is.
Patty: Easy, dad, she might fall off.
Ben: (Laughing) Who cares?! Its a real gut buster.
by Dusty's Baby Powder November 1, 2010
Get the Cranston Crunch mug.The act of drinking hot chocolate mixed with honey. The idea behind this is that the hot cocoa plus the warm honey heats up the body. This is done by Opal Crankshaft in the winter when she's cold. And she also does it to her ex-husband, Earl.
Opal: Hey sweetie, I feel like some coco. You want to get honeybodied?
Ed: What are you talking about? I've never heard of that.
Opal: Well, it works this way: (mixing the coco with the honey) see, they're both hot and the heat warms up the body.
Ralph M.: Hey Ed, what's going on? What's that drink?
Ed: You want some? We're getting honeybodied here.
Ralph D.: Count me in, too. I'm so cold and stiff from that workout I had today. June nearly drove me crazy!
Opal: Well, here y'all. Have some of this stuff. Its guaranteed; you'll be honeybodied in no time!
Ed: What are you talking about? I've never heard of that.
Opal: Well, it works this way: (mixing the coco with the honey) see, they're both hot and the heat warms up the body.
Ralph M.: Hey Ed, what's going on? What's that drink?
Ed: You want some? We're getting honeybodied here.
Ralph D.: Count me in, too. I'm so cold and stiff from that workout I had today. June nearly drove me crazy!
Opal: Well, here y'all. Have some of this stuff. Its guaranteed; you'll be honeybodied in no time!
by Dusty's Baby Powder January 16, 2011
Get the Honeybodied mug.A funeral held for dead flowers. Usually in a flowerbed side service honoring the sweetness and beauty of the dead flowers. Usually held after cutting or throwing away the dead flowers. Is also often held in a church. The only known Flower Funeral happened on November 18, 2011 when Ed Crankshaft, his daughter Pam Murdoch, and her husband Jeff were attending the funeral of a close friend. A Flower Funeral is not sad. In fact, it is very calming. So, if you want beautiful flowers for all time, hold a Flower Funeral for the ones you lost. Its a sweet thing to do.
Ed: Oh no, all my flower died. How am I going to remember them?
Pam: Why not have a Flower Funeral for them? We could crush them up and bury them.
Jeff: Sure! Lets go to Camp Swampy. I bet Stainy Stainglass would officiate.
Ed: Sure, a Flower Funeral would be nice because I love my garden! Sweet.
Stainy: Yes, I'll help! (he starts praying over the flowers) Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in memory of these beautiful flowers. May they always live in Heaven in beauty. (he makes the cross sign)
Ed: (bursts out crying) Poor flowers. I don't know what to do.
Stainy: Easy, I know you're stressed. But I got the Mary Mud right here. (he starts massaging Ed with the Mary Mud) Remember how good that felt? Its a nice way to end a Flower Funeral.
Jeff: (jumping up and down crying) I need some of that, too. Can I have some?
Stainy: Sure! This is the most important part of a Flower Funeral. You need flowers to stop stressing over flowers. Remember, flowers have power!
Pam: Sure. Its easy. Just remember its a trial but Flower Funerals make you smile! (she kisses Stainy and he rubs her with the Mary Mud)
Pam: Why not have a Flower Funeral for them? We could crush them up and bury them.
Jeff: Sure! Lets go to Camp Swampy. I bet Stainy Stainglass would officiate.
Ed: Sure, a Flower Funeral would be nice because I love my garden! Sweet.
Stainy: Yes, I'll help! (he starts praying over the flowers) Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in memory of these beautiful flowers. May they always live in Heaven in beauty. (he makes the cross sign)
Ed: (bursts out crying) Poor flowers. I don't know what to do.
Stainy: Easy, I know you're stressed. But I got the Mary Mud right here. (he starts massaging Ed with the Mary Mud) Remember how good that felt? Its a nice way to end a Flower Funeral.
Jeff: (jumping up and down crying) I need some of that, too. Can I have some?
Stainy: Sure! This is the most important part of a Flower Funeral. You need flowers to stop stressing over flowers. Remember, flowers have power!
Pam: Sure. Its easy. Just remember its a trial but Flower Funerals make you smile! (she kisses Stainy and he rubs her with the Mary Mud)
by Dusty's Baby Powder November 23, 2011
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